I have found that:
  • → sincere prayer
  • → genuine intentions
  • → present-focus
  • → extended humor
  • → careful integrity
  • → constant work to discover and release all forms of bias in oneself
  • → dogged effort to pursue awareness, divine guidance and understanding
Leads a person to "interactive insight from the inside."

~~~
Consciously I want to evolve.
My ego resists strenuously.
I surreally "forget" so much!
So I blog for myself, mostly:
to re-read and remember.
~~~

People ask me where to begin with the complexity of the stuff on my blog. But my imaginal and related work spans 25 years as of 2016. So the real answer is "I don't know." I can't put all that in a sound bite. And one would have to understand, not just intellectually but experientially, a lot of it from start to middle to begin to understand where I am now. It is 'active imagination' work, resting on an extremely 'open' definition of archetype and energy, mapped at times to various occult patterns because they seem useful and otherwise just loosely personal; but that's not all. Short of how the blog speaks for itself that's about all I can say about it. It's a path I've built myself, for one. ~ Palyne


In the human spirit, as in the universe, nothing is higher or lower; everything has equal rights to a common center which manifests its hidden existence precisely through this harmonic relationship between every part and itself.
-- Goethe


Angels transcend every religion, every philosophy, every creed. In fact angels have no religion as we know it... their existence precedes every religious system that has ever existed on earth.
-- St. Thomas Aquinas

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In the beginning all was indivisible. And in becoming manifest, it became, seemingly, divisible. But the divisions must evolve to recognize themselves, and each other, and to then accept themselves, to truly know themselves by knowing each other. To begin, they are blended, confused; it is chaos, it is legion. They are all on the journey to indivisibility, to singularity, to the I AM. The point, of course, is not the destination, but the journey.

-- insight during the Princess of Disks meditation

Spiritual growth is like all other types: you absorb seemingly 'other' energy, and it becomes part of your own sense of identity. The growth is in awareness, and with that comes power which is always over Self.
Diversity is Legion;
Singularity is the I AM.
None of this is new although my approach to it is my own. -- Palyne



Inner Guide is Angelic. She is free of anything akin to doctrine. I call her an Angel because that is the only word I have for it, and because I know, all the way through me, that this is our word for her fundamentally divine nature. Aside from that, I don’t even know what she IS exactly, or what it means, or where it would fit into any model. She is life sized, soul wide, colors and gems and flowers and songs, everything beautiful that ever was, condensed into an identity I am completely in love with–except she feels like part of me too, so it’s like also being in love with yourself, and also with God, and also with the whole universe, both every tiny thing in your mundania, and ‘awareness’ as something so utterly, mind-bogglingly amazing — how could this exist? How could this not exist? How could I ever understand such a thing? — I am left only with joy, with awe.
-- on Inner Guide #4, aka 'Sedaena'. The first IG I had genuine conversation (and reading) with; the first real sign of my HGA.

He is so much inside and outside me, larger than me and yet the light of the tiniest particles of me, I don’t even have a word for whatever it is that he IS. I call him angelic and inner guide and the name he gave me because I have no idea what else to call this. It’s a Being and a Thing and an Event and a Place and a Relationship and… it’s like there is no label that is remotely big enough to encompass whatever it IS.
-- on Inner Guide #5, aka 'Mark.'


The boundary between the imaginational and imaginal is rather fuzzy and it is a developed skill and art to learn to stay there; to maintain your own autonomy while allowing the-others’ autonomy; to be shocked, astounded, grossed out, effused, and other surprise emotions from the interaction; all this without getting lost in the experience like a dream, yet also without pulling back to controlling the experience like a daydream. The former is being swept away by the river, and the latter is standing on the shore thinking about it; learning to walk the fine line of control and allowance to stay in that ‘imaginal realm’ actually takes practice. Crazy people think it’s all autonomous and happening ‘to’ them; people unable to allow this for themselves, may think it’s all imagination; and they’d both be right, because they are both lost; the goal is a whole world that bridges and encompasses both of those.

-- on "Interworlds Meditation"


Q: Where are you now?

Me: Well, back in my own reality.

Q: Wrong. You are in a reality version that distraction and denial have made for you.

Me: How do I get out?

Q: Wrong question. There is no space, there is no time. Where are you again?

Me: Oh. I’m wherever I "pay attention" to being.

Q: Right. You PAY attention. It is the currency of your soul. You rent your reality. Never forget that. The choice to move is yours.




Dealing with the unconscious has become a question of life for us.
The play of the imagination is incalculable.
~ Carl Jung

The imaginary can be innocuous, the imaginal never can.
~ Henry Corbin

A calling may be postponed, avoided, intermittently missed. It may also possess you completely. Whatever; eventually it will out. It makes its claim. The daimon does not go away.
~ James Hillman

There comes a time when the mind takes a higher plane of knowledge but can never prove how it got there.
-- Albert Einstein


ABOUT ME


This blog documents much of my work in the "inter-worlds" of a greater-self. It's not just esoteric: every thing corresponds — the mundane, the arcane, the divine. If it had to be summed up you might say it is "a universe of personalization." A strange place where monotheism and ultimate-pantheism are one and the same.

I am a natural mystic, if spontaneous experiences determine such a thing. I am not religious in any way; only guidance from the inside drives me. No identities or models unless they are introduced to me from the inside. (Sometimes I use them simply for interest, or because their models are convenient doorways -- but I accept none of their doctrines.) I briefly studied theology at one point, independently (I consider constant prayer a valid part of edu too), and where it led me was "anywhere-else." It's fine for others of course. I consider the heart of free will to be that everyone has their own road. Or as Heinlein once wrote, the right to go to hell in their own handbasket.

This tends to make me obsessed with the divine yet not religious at all, in any form, which is often confusing to onlookers. I am ever in love with and in closer pursuit of integration with The Christ (which I consider a solar-planetary deity, exceeding and preceding all possible religion, though cyclically present within our species) but I'm not remotely a modern Christian, and this also tends to be very confusing to onlookers. I'm a student of archetypes and pattern systems, yet not a jungian intellectual - armchair philosophy bores me - nor a power occultist - which has its own issues (and uniforms) to say the least.

After nearly two decades of certain experiences I felt alone with and thought were unique to me, it turns out I find some harmony in the gnostic writings. I didn't get it from there, and am not fond of that doctrine and the paradigms it came in with, so I ignore it. Which means despite talking about just a few things specific to it (by unknowing accident until a few years ago), I'm not part of that model either.

The road I walk is my own. It doesn't really have an easy label or anybody else on it, that I can see. This is between me and God, so it doesn't really need to work for anybody else. I used to wish I wasn't the only person with such experiences or practices, and started a blog in part in the hope I might find others with something similar. Maybe a need for community. I'm over that now, at least I think. I walk alone, but Light is with me. Can't ask for more than that.

-- Palyne


When we understand that perception is as much about source as target; that energy is a spectrum and best psi perception comes from the center, its balance and blend; that the manifest communication of our Selves is the literal 'reality' we experience; that everything in that reality is a profound 3D language element; that insight with the ‘center’ of spectrum is likely to be via the language-symbols of 'reality;' that these need to be interpreted at the level they are received; this is the path for intentional psi.
-- Insight on the Art of RV

Chakras (Portals of the Powers)

My gradual understanding of what are called ‘chakras’ has changed so much, so often, and so radically, that it is almost difficult to have any conversation about it with others. Like anything else my world of personalization, imaginal meditation, and all the spontaneous stuff that was long before and through that of course, seems to result in me having a somewhat distinctive experience that I can rarely find anyone who shares.

In order to communicate with people, you have to use words that you and they share a definition for. And if they already have a whole set of paradigms about how something works, you can’t just tell them how-it-is for you, because they will absorb that into a pattern that is totally wrong, and may even make it seem nonsensical.

So to do this right, I have to go backward and start at the very beginning, so the model that has built itself inside me (from the input of these energies, often in actual conversation or ‘sponsored insight’) can roll out. I think I will try a logical outline format, just to help break it up a bit. This information is nearly all from direct experience with the chakras or the powers. There is likely a little bit of just-me in here too but hopefully nothing that makes it wrong.

I. Source of the energy
II. Distribution of the energy
III. The energy in human bodies
IV. Different types and quantity of this energy in the body
V. Chakras humans are most familiar with
VI. Major chakras humans are less familiar with
VII. Something else (Daath?)
VIII. The evolution of the chakras
IX. The chakras, symbology and geometry
X. Chakras: relationships, communications and realities
XI. The alleged light-body

I. Source of the energy

In old documents you sometimes hear of “the powers and the glories.” The energy source that eventually becomes part of what we call chakras is from “The Powers.” (I think. This was not shared with me from inside, it’s just an intellectual belief, though based a little bit on experience.) This stems from an impossibly huge awareness that is basically ‘our larger self’ but it’s so much larger that really we are into close-as-we-get-to-God territory here. This energy makes not only life but ‘awareness’ of the earth-type possible.

II. Distribution of the energy

This is throughout our existence. Human bodies are not the only thing this energy weaves through. Every significantly manifest-identity has this energy woven through it. Mountains have something akin to their own version of chakras, awareness, etc. as do many other elements of earth that we normally do not even consider alive let alone sentient — several are vastly more sentient and powerful than ourselves.

III. The energy in human bodies

It’s a bit amusing, but the easiest way to model this visually is like a rainbow. By default on our planet, energy from the earth rises; energy from the sun reaches down; they love each other, crave each other, and there is an “ever-happening-event” which is their joining in the middle. Now imagine those merged energies that wrapped up in each other in delight have a third energy come from the side — that rainbow — and it twines into them and now a manifest form comes into existence in the middle of that ‘event’, in our beat-pattern of reality — our physical body. It is a powerhouse made from earth; enlightened by sun; and moved by the Powers that wove it into Being.

IV. Different types and quantity of this energy in the body

The pattern-form of the body is resonant with the power. Everywhere the energy of the powers meets or crosses other energy, it forms a vortex/vortice. Think of it like a ‘spinning’ dance those crossing energies are doing together. These “whirling energy points” were named Chakras long ago in the East, which essentially means “wheels” — round things that spin.  The top of the main chakras actually do have ’round things that spin’ (the bottom has a sort of ‘sump pump’ like nature, and there is energy between) but each of them are a bit different.

The size, detail and density of this depends on the pattern of the body. There is of course a pattern specific to ‘human bodies’ but each individual body is also different depending on the — for lack of a better word — manifestation of the body in the first place. (This is modeled in the actual body itself, which has vastly more biochemical individuality in organ/tissue shape, size, weight, function, input and output than most people have any idea.) So for example we all have a heart chakra, but its detail varies greatly between people — and even within one person over the course of their life experience.

There are tons of these in the body, and they vary greatly. The human pattern shape in general has chakras ranging from nearly atomic in size, to so large they take up a decent horizontal swath of the torso (and the larger ‘energy body’ extensively around that as well). Their detail depends on the part of the body they are part of manifesting. They are in every joint, every lymph node, every organ (and the body considers every individual bone to be an organ by the way), every gland. I don’t know how many there are, but I once saw an old reference to ‘144,000’ and this would not seem unreasonable to me.

The powers are not a ‘hard-separation’ from each other. First, the legs and arms have some blending of different powers all operating in them. Second, the body doesn’t just stop one energy and begin another; the powers are “gradients” into each other. Let us model this in the rainbow colors for convenience: so there are parts of a person that are orange, and red, but there are parts that are more orange-red, and some that are more red-orange.

The Powers are Aeons. That is to say they span a certain energy of the entire Self and they are all, all of it, but each of them is focused on one specific part of it. So they may manifest separately in our experience in many ways but they are all part of one system and one larger intelligence.

V. Chakras humans are most familiar with

In the West there are “seven chakras” that people are generally familiar with. These are located, on the body, at the crown of the head, at the forehead, at the throat, at the heart, at the solar plexus, a little below the navel, and at the perineum. They are generally rainbow-colored in light-violet, indigo blue, light blue, green, yellow, orange, and red.

Some ‘new age’ thought on the internet is that there is a ‘high heart’ chakra, above the heart, which is teal (fitting in the rainbow spectrum I suppose). More on that below. In any case I don’t think I consider that a chakra.

There seems to be very little awareness, in the people I meet and on the internet at least, of the rather massive collection of other chakras in the body beyond the seven major.

The general understanding of the nature of a chakra seems to be that it is simply an energy vortex. It is that, but it is so much more. I consider them basically each a nexus, or gateway, between ‘the power’ of their source energy (their rainbow color you might say), and the Aeonic energy that joined it to ‘weave’ my body.

VI. Major Chakras humans are less familiar with

Not counting all those of lesser size and so on, there are some other chakras that I have become aware of through experience. And one something-else.

  1. Below the feet and soles of the feet. Our energy body is a torus. A tall one with a super thin center, so it’s not so obviously a torus as the average ‘donut/bagel’ shape would be. I only know it’s a torus because crown has showed me a few times. The energy is always moving. The energy that fountains from crown flows down around us. Most of it goes below us, about a foot or so below our feet, and then is pulled back up into us through a chakra about a foot below and then fed through the chakras at the soles of the feet. (Some of that energy is pulled up into the kundalini, which gets some of it by sheer gravity-like power as it goes past. But most comes up through the bottom of the feet.) This energy goes through the entire body, and as a result, shares its experience on the way upward.Literally the thought you had, after processing by the crown, is projected outward into what we call the energy that manifests our reality, and then it is pulled back up through us, so even your kneecap experiences the energy of that thought. And then your elbow experiences not only the energy of that thought, but the energy of your kneecap too.
  2. Above the head (above the crown). This has a similar relationship to the feet mentioned above. The crown chakra actually has multiple ‘divisions’ (I have been shown two sets of three so far, like ‘layers’ each with its own function. There might be more), but about 8-12 inches above the crown is another chakra. In general, all the chakras are divine, but the one well above the head seems more ‘divine’ (if it is even possible for that to be any kind of gradient) and less in ‘our world’ than the others. That is only my impression, I don’t know much about it yet.

VII. Something else

Above the heart. I don’t know where the internet and new age folks get the teal high heart chakra and all the feel-good qualities they attribute to it. I have never seen such a thing.

What I have seen is that at one point, heart chakra operating like a tiny person literally took a pickax (seriously!) and ripped open my chest and back — as if digging out bone or something — and revealed a large hole right through the center of me. Like it was always there and I didn’t know about it until he removed the covering front and back.

I could see all the way through me. It was utter blackness, I mean emptiness. I was a little freaked out at the time, I had no idea what was going on. I trusted that heart was all good, but I felt hugely vulnerable and had to care for and clean and protect it. I called it the ‘un’ chakra because it not only wasn’t a vortex of energy it was literally empty, far as I could tell. It gradually got a bit thinner than the initial huge hole, which was a relief.

Over time I went in it, and if I went ‘out the side’ of it, it would seem to go through the universe and just loop back again, as if it were a universe sized torus with its open middle being that ‘tube through my chest.’ Once, heart sort of twisted the front and back against each other like wringing a rag, and tons of these tiny stones fell into the tunnel and I picked them up, they were like amazing tiny gems, and I was told they were representative energy of the stars — there was more to it than I am saying, that is a summary. I took to calling it the universe tunnel.

Sometimes I mention my meditations to my friend or kid, but I tried to avoid telling anybody I had a huge black hole through the middle of my chest. I didn’t think that would sound like a good thing to anybody else.

The Four (my elements-of-soul, I am 4th of 4) center there now.

If I go into it and ask questions, it answers.  Once in there, I saw an eye. It was almost like a carved eye and an icon-eye not a real eye, and yet somehow it was more real than is possible, yet it was utterly still like a statue would be, I think that’s why I got the carved/icon impressions. But it was looking at me, I felt that, like it was a ‘symbol of awareness.’

Quoting from my journaling:

I was silent for a moment, surprised and a little nonplussed, and then I said, “You are alive?”

“Yes,” it said.

“You can see me?” I said, although I guess that was a stupid question.

“Yes.”

“Can you see me in here, or see me in my outer world too?”

“I can see all of you that is part of you which is more of you than you know.”

My brain had to sort through that a moment.

“You are a tunnel into the universe?”

“I AM the universe.”

“What are you doing inside me?”

“What are you doing inside ME?”

I had no idea what to say. I sort of just ‘stood around’ in my head in the dark for awhile.

I found myself idly wondering what The Four have to do with this area of me, why they seem to anchor there. Then as if in answer I had all these memories of some recent pictures I saw of ancient Buddhas which had very specifically a swastika (that is a four-fold sign) right on the chest — right between where throat and heart chakras would be. That made me think that it wasn’t just some weirdness with me; this is how it works…

…if I knew more about whatever “it” is.

— from ‘The Eye of the Universe’ 

But sometimes it just seems to ‘echo’ and ask me back whatever I said.  Later I wondered if the long tube and the eye in the Thoth tarot card “The Universe” (which is the embodiment of ‘The Four’ as I see it) was related to that. I don’t know.

At one point, heart and all the other chakras got together like they were tiny little people, walked down my chest and squatted, put their palms down all the way around it, and then they were done, and sort of… burned themselves, or it, or both, into me or something, hard to explain. Like sealing it in or something (not closing it, just anchoring it).

There was this thick deep rich black border around it that was almost like a scar, raised in nature but part of my flesh too it seemed like, with odd symbols or shapes each carrying the vivid color of that chakra against the black, the symbol/shapes like thin neon tubes of intense light sort of. It showed up on my back too.

I still don’t know what it is. But I am comfortable with it now. Sometimes I have done a meditation where I go in there and ask for a given energy and I am taken to it, as if all things are inherently present there, like it’s totally empty yet has infinite potential.

Later I noticed (didn’t at the time) that the Thoth tarot prince of — I think wands — has something a little like this on him. It’s in that area, and raised like a scar, and round. But it’s way too big compared to mine, and it’s flesh colored not black, and it’s done up like it’s a flower or something, when the symbols around mine actually look a lot like some cross between “symbols and a circuit board.” I assume that this is referring to the same thing, though. I felt better when I found that, since it made it seem a little less weirdly-specific-to-me. (A lot of Thoth tarot ends up having symbols I have experienced in meditations, quite specifically no less, which I find interesting.)

Once all this had played out, I realized this symbolism has been everywhere, I just never understood it. Like once in a meditation where ‘the secret key’ turned out to be ‘nothingness’ and the password was a zero, then the four and I went through a perfectly round tube-like opening…

VIII. The evolution of the chakras

I never actually know what is going on. Anything I learn is “eventually in retrospect.” I’ve learned to be ok with that because the alternative puts my logical mind in front and my evolution comes to a dead stop. So I can explain how this happened for me but I can’t say whether it is like this for everybody, or just for me. “Personalization” is a key point of how I interact with the interworlds and my body.

Over many years it was repeatedly presented to me that the chakras were an “interface” and it was an identity. In my relationship to… everything, anything can be an identity. Whether that is self-aware let alone autonomous is another story, but everything is inherently part of awareness. But any accumulation of energy which has a specific form, shape, function, meaning, is definitely an identity. Every time it came up I dismissed it. I found notes on this going back many years in journals. I just wasn’t ready to even consider such a thing.

Even with my Aeons (let alone chakras) I have had a serious cognitive dissonance problem accepting that territory I considered a singular me was in fact, although singular, also a conglomerate. The reality is everything in the universe is one, and is infinite, and both are true at the same time. It is just very difficult for us to wrap our brains around that.

But gradually I was forced to acknowledge this, and was introduced to the major chakras as identities. The first one I met had been talking to me, I was initially lucid in a dream then just lucid period though my body was asleep, then he yelled his name at me repeatedly as I was awakening so I could not forget it. Yelled it. It was a little overwhelming. lt was also lacking all vowels, and all in capitals. ACKRCK. This was my forehead chakra. It presented as male.

Some time later, he tried to have a conscious conversation with me. I avoided it, my mind cycling through “no way!” every few seconds, sabotaged it, and then refused to write it down, for an entire month — usually I forget truly ‘new’ energies within hours if that, unless I journal — until I had truly forgotten it. I felt miserable about that later, but it’s an example of how hard this was for me at the time.

The second I met was presented as his ‘mate’ and her name was BUSM. I wondered what it was with the capitals and not-real-words for their names. I didn’t understand the mate thing. I refused her even though inner guide and ACKRCK told me she was good. Then I woke up in pain, and they and my Aeons told me I had been attacked by an archon (which honest to god I’d barely heard of until then and thought was hilarious — I’d never had any idea such a thing would ever have anything to do with me) in the area of vulnerability I had created in my energy field by rejecting BUSM. They assured me they had stopped the invasion and it was ok now. I wondered, if it had been worse, if I’d have woken up really sick.

It turns out BUSM is the throat chakra. I had a fabulous dream where I-as-she put on the first half of bridal clothing and repeatedly rubbed the blue of the throat chakra on my forehead for some reason, and then went to my wedding. I guess there must be some kind of merging of those chakras though I don’t know the detail. BUSM when I finally felt her, was weirdly like a pole. Like she went out the side of my throat and then on the other side of my body, out the side of my leg. I had no model for this at all until I saw some of the wands cards. I’ve had some other experiences with poles, like one that got a horus-like head and was a ‘wand of power’ it said and then took up residence in the middle of me.

The first (kundalini) chakra gave me the name Konewa Turi. I’ve had a decent amount of interaction with this chakra. They have quite the opinion though.

From my journals:

Me: Hi. I’ve been thinking about you lately. I think mostly about the identity question. My friend said something that got me pondering this issue of you being another identity, I mean another, not mine.

KT: We are all another identity.

Me: Well yeah I know, but there’s these stories of Kundalini rising and they kind of imply that your… identity sort of supersedes the one dominant until then. Like maybe displaces it. Like an usurper.

KT: How do you know the previous personality was not the usurper?

Me: Well see, I just don’t feel ok with that idea! I mean it’s like implying that after all these years suffering in the body, my personality is sort of cast aside.

KT: This is a limitation of your model. While your personality is dominant, it throws the rest of the identities inherent in the body into darkness, to varying degrees. You occlude. When my personality is active, it brings light to all the identities of the body. Including what you think of as yours. I do not displace. I enlighten.

Me: Oh.

I have the feeling, as he says that though, that in the process of ‘bringing light to’ what turns out to be vastly more personalities than we dream, including very powerful ones, and their sort of “blend,” that this results in something just as foreign to the now-of-us as the original idea of displacement might have been.

KT shifts suddenly into something I have never seen before. Now she is a very tall (like 8′) woman, very lean and ‘sinuous’ somehow, with vertical pupil near-glowing gold eyes, and fiery red hair, and light copperish skin, lots of it showing, and some kind of gold shine-jewelry here and there that I can’t quite make out, but she is so awe-some I just stop and gape at her.

Me: That is the most simultaneously beautiful and terrifying thing I’ve ever seen. The eyes… oh my god. And you as a woman! I’ve never seen you as female before. I mean, I thought of you as being ‘balanced’ —

KT: All those you call chakras are innately balanced. The dynamics you think of as male and female are in all.

Me: OK. But I guess, you know, the whole ‘projective’ thing up the spine seemed rather male I guess. Tell me, speaking of the spine, when you are… activated inside me, is it possible that you could do some kind of harm to my heart when you come to or through that area?

KT: I may.

Me: Oh. Well that’s honest I guess. Aside from decent health in general, what can I do that would minimize any negative side effects for me?

If she answered, I don’t know what she said, because this is my last memory before waking up this morning. I do have the sense that she responded though.

— from A brief moment with Konewa Turi

The second chakra gave me the name Bessand Ari and has mostly interacted with me regarding food — I am long term somewhat anorexic and apparently most of the processing area of the body is in its range — and regarding its entwinement with the other chakras. Although all chakras actually work together in some ways, the second especially does, as a sort of ‘creative’ energy you might say.

The third chakra gave me the name Kyana Daoen and is very powerful but for me was a bit damaged, partly from eons of eating gluten that was ripping tiny holes in my entire digestive tubing apparently, partly from other issues that essentially affected “will” for me. A couple of my Aeons are very strong there, the one that relates to my body and how I perceive and others perceive it (Taan), and the one that relates to… well I’m not sure but it’s something to do with the geometry of forms and relationships (Ithikah). KD is awesome.

Also an identity that used to talk to me a lot circa ’94 and I called The Narrator, which is apparently what Casteneda called an inorganic, is part of a larger identity that calls itself The Private Oracle (Seth {Jane Roberts} mentioned this, but on even the thought of it, he showed right up), and it blended with one of my Aeons and gave me a brief lecture at Kyana’s house, so that’s in that area. The lecture told me I needed to talk with the chakras daily — say hello, we live in the same house after all — and that any health issue from a daily minor wound to major stuff I should be communing with the related chakra about.

I haven’t had a lot of interaction with him yet, but sometimes KD will pop in with some kind of insight. Like once, the Sun told me that “the sword is love, not anger” and I argued, saying I’d accomplished things when very angry and he said it was despite that, not because of it. Later, I was thinking, why would this be so, though? Doesn’t being angry give you great ‘will’ energy? And KD said to me: Because love gives me energy from above, and adds to me. Anger pulls energy from below, and so drains it from me.

The fourth chakra gave me a name that took me awhile to work out since it sounds like almost nothing but vowels: Alayaowaeyiia. It sounds like something Hawai’ian kind of. I’ve had a lot of interaction with him. I was introduced to his ‘reality’ — all the chakras have a frequency bandwidth that is a reality, as we would think of it, of their own — by 3rd of 4. He called the people there the Themelians. That made me laugh later. Made me wonder if Crowley heard someone wrong and since he was so bloody educated, ‘recognized’ Thelema the Greek word and built a whole paradigm on it. Probably I just committed occult heresy even joking about that. Anyway, they have two different looks but I think both are real. One has to do with the heart, they are like a intense middle royal blue and ‘pulse.’

The other though is their native species look, which is humanoid but not exactly, tall, large eyes, and they actually have “irregular” varying stripes (not ‘straight’ in any way), usually fairly wide ones (like 2-5 inches wide, but vertical) on their face at least, and the skin is totally sparkly, and the stripes are these incredibly rich colors like deepest blues and greens and more. (I later wondered if the alleged ‘dream’ that woman had that led to her writing ‘Twilight’ had some heart chakra interaction, as her vampires were sparkly-skinned rather like this, except they weren’t colorful.) They are so beautiful it is heart-moving. This chakra is the one who has helped me so much with the thing right above him. He has this incredibly “upright” posture which translates somehow to “righteousness” of the most divine kind.

BUSM (throat) interaction can be very unsettling. It includes smell and taste and hearing, and if you have never tasted “the fundamental nature” of most things in our food supply you’re in for a big, horrified surprise. I basically had to beg for ‘ignoring’ agri-chems and eat nuts and berries for a bit because everything had its own version of hideous. It’s like you can taste plastic, chemicals, metals, and even disease in animals with a meat, everything, all in one impossible ball of please-I-don’t-want-to-know.

As for hearing, sound has dimension and depth which we cannot convey in our outer world which is frustrating. For example if a letter is “deep” like “twice the energy of this letter” we have to put two of them together side by side, so they are shallow but wide, instead of deep. Also, the ‘geometry’ of English does not very well match the meaning of what we are saying with the sounds, which causes all kinds of frustration when sensitive to it. Throat is very tied to water, soothed by water, and looks rather like it as well. If you are looking at a pool on a sunny morning with the water in motion, or a picture taken looking down at a gorgeous tropical island beach or lagoon, it’s like that.

ACKRCK (forehead) interaction tends to be very ‘visceral.’ Visuals have texture and emotion and more. And most people who want to open their third eye would do very well to just leave that sucker closed because much like the throat, seeing the energy as it really is, can be rather horrifying. You can look at something and although on the surface it’s ok, underneath you can see this bizarre mix of what comes off like plastic, cancerous, mold-slime, with pieces of jagged metal, or something weird like that — and you wish you hadn’t looked because you feel it all through you viscerally. I have to thank this chakra who is probably responsible for the majority of my interworld experience though.

Crown chakra has not given me a name. It is kind and has talked with me a lot though. It did tell me that the three names of the first three layers could simply be their “functions” — that we might as well use that as names — and I call them RCA. This stands for ‘restoration,’ which is where the energy is restored to its form (it suffers fragmenting, fractalizing, and other issues during its journey through us); and ‘conversion,’ which is where the energy is shifted to a form that the crown chakra handles for throwing out into (and against) the larger energy field we perceive as reality; and ‘amplification,’ which is where a huge ‘signal boost’ happens before it’s pushed literally into a “fountain” out the top, that is a circle and goes all the way around us.

The big energy body torus we are part of that comes down has a bunch — I think around nine — “lines of gold power” through it, which are strong near the crown, but then “diffuse” greatly very shortly on its way down, more and more, and then gradually gets cohesive again back into these lines of gold power as it reaches under the feet and is going to be pulled back in.

There are another three layers which are actually more ‘outside’ and on the way down — near the side of the head. Loosely, the first relates to the power with which we manifest our thoughts into experiential reality; the second relates to our ability to ‘connect’ (perceive the relationship of) our thoughts and reality in order to understand our creation; the third relates to the intensity which here means duration of time between the thought and the perceived manifestation. At one point in my life after ‘blowing open the crown’ (not actually a good thing in many ways) I had this, and it was like reality reacted to my thoughts – not only within minutes but even within seconds, changes in reality that were astronomically improbable if not impossible, and I could see and feel (generally) why and how. It was so obvious.

But when the time between extends and the effects dull it’s less and less obvious how what we think or do relates to our reality. The crown basically turns down the volume on most all of us to save itself and us too. The more it trusts that the energy coming up through is clean and not harmful, the more it is willing to intensify the manifestation, speed to it, and so on.

I have not been introduced to the chakra above the crown. And I have repeatedly asked the chakras at the soles of my feet and below my feet to talk with me but so far none have volunteered. I have significant health problems related to my legs — I even once had an experience with a Larger (a super powerful higher-entity) who said in confused frustration, Why won’t your legs talk to me?? so this might be related.

There are some instances when I have seen that elements of a chakra or function were “emergent properties.” This also goes for issues with awareness and identity. My own whole identity is also an “emergent property” of the Aeons-Powers and more that weave this energy/form-body, so this concept is getting a bit popular in my interworlds lately — to my distress as to me that makes it virtual or less real, neither of which are true, but which contribute to my cognitive dissonance issues.

This means, though, that sometimes there are elements that just don’t exist for someone ‘until or unless.’

IX. The chakras, symbology and geometry

I don’t want to open up other major subjects here but I must mention them in passing in order to start the next part. Things that the interworlds keep trying to get through my head include:

Everything is symbol. There is no such thing as symbolic in that everything is symbolic. People and houses are as symbolic as obscure green geometries. Our entire experiential reality inside and out is nothing more than manifest energy and it is, inherently and always, a symbol. Because all things are equally symbol and symbolic, all things are equal in this regard. Some ancient cabalah symbol is no more a symbol than a gum wrapper or sewing machine. Yes it might actually have vastly more inherent power but it’s all still symbol. Our chakras are symbols (since everything is). Our lymph nodes are symbols. Our cat. Our city. Events. Everything.

Everything is energy. There is no such thing as solid mass, everything is vibrating energy, that’s basic physics. How this is perceived depends on a number of things, starting with biological filtering, however it can be perceived entirely differently as well, and one thing humans excel in is this ability to perceive things in many ways (“I AM a universal translator,” I once said about remote viewing). The imaginal meditation work that I do leans heavily on this: the “energy” is fundamentally just a big group of energy, and it can literally flow into anything at all. A landscape. An event. A person or creature. A machine or object. A community of people, a spaceport. All of the above! And I can interact with it like that. And it is no less effective or real a relationship than if it were perceived as something else entirely.

You could almost think of it like ‘raw ingredients.’ If you have a bunch of flour you can make anything from italian spinach noodles to chocolate cake or oatmeal cookies to chicken gravy to paper mache — it’s just energy, put it in whatever form you wish, it is no less real, no less legitimate, no matter what form it’s found within.

Our body is a symbol, and every component. Our reality is a symbol, and every component. It is all just energy. It is poured into a given “structure” that we are constantly creating (crown chakra).

But there are other equally valid symbols you can make of the same energy — it is infinite. My previous inner guide (angelic Sedaena, IG#4) took me to a world, a planet, that is my body. There, my chakras are present as temples in that world, stretching around most of the planet in a straight line. By temples I mean they look like uber-gigantic gemstones, but “lit from within,” that shine intensely for miles around, and many people come there like it’s a major center of that region, and there are various buildings around them.

Of the meditation where I met them like this I later wrote: “I’d just finished trying to grasp that chakras were identities. Now they were giant gems in some world’s landscape?” I heard inside me: They are many things, as you are many things.

Between and around them, around the rest of the planet, are ‘glories.’ That’s what I perceive them as. The Powers… and the Glories. They are both represented in the body. This is how I perceive my organs. Like kidneys. Also like vertebrae. (The body considers bones to be organs. Once I read on them a bit I realized this is totally right. We have this bias that if they seem firm or hard to us they must be dead like a rock. Not true at all — they are not only composites but often have manufacturing facilities!) Glories translate symbolically for me in that world as “golden statues.” The major organs (that don’t have the major chakras) are huge golden statues, I mean really huge. The smaller the chakra, the smaller the statue, down to tiny statuettes. I grant, I find this a little confusing, but it’s all symbol, so, whatever.

I call it ‘the chakra-gem world’ but I understand it is merely a “different rearrangement of the energy that is me.” So it is symbolic yes. But it is no less real than anything else. I am learning to work with this model, as its novelty compared to my own body and world seems to help in some ways. I am less biased.

Geometries / Chakras in the chakra-gem-world that is “me”

The first chakra (Konewa Turi) is like the purest fire, like it would be plasma if it were just the slightest bit more in our frequency bandwidth. It is the most fiercely bright-red-red. It’s a double-ended tetrahedron (three-sided pyramid) – three facets each point, and then a slightly extended length in the middle joining them. It is balanced right at the center and spins rapidly in every direction, throwing its light all over. I had the feeling if you focused, you could make the turning settle a bit, like to going up and down instead of all over. I was slightly afraid of the inherent power I could feel in it and only let the tiniest thread of it touch me.

The second chakra (Bessand Ari) is such a rich orange I actually get ‘fruity’ and ‘food’ impressions from it. Its shape was the most difficult for me to get clear on, but BA has helped me and shown me various versions. Basically it is shaped like a fruit that is a sphere but is just slightly larger at one side than the other, and ever so slightly longer than a pure sphere. So it seems almost irregular in a way, that is different than all the others. It comes across as a gem of that color though.

The third chakra (Kyana Daoen) is pure yellow. Not gold at all, really yellow. It was a perfect cube. KD has told me that it manages energies including those which are in conflict. I got the impression once of the Tango — how opposing energies, ‘squared,’ could actually work together. The sun is in all chakras (as he told me once) but for some reason I was especially aware of him here.

The fourth chakra (Alayaowaeyiia) is rich green. Not just one shade, a gazillion shades. It was an octahedron (four-sided pyramid), however its ‘gem-of-light’ went straight up for a bit and only then ‘turned’ so the four sides moved into the shape.

The fifth chakra (BUSM) is azure or cerulean. A gazillion shades, ever in motion, looks a great deal like a very busy, water-moving blue pool in sunlight. It was a docahedron (I would never have known these shape names but for accidental find later), except with a very large ‘flat’ facet on the surface, and then all the others around the far edge. It is tempting to just want to “fall into it.” I did once see it looking turqoise, almost greenish, still that beautiful “tropical water in the sunlight” look though.

The sixth chakra (ACKRCK) is cobalt. To be clear, this is blue-with-purple. I can often see the light of this chakra with my eyes closed if it’s dark enough. In the gem-of-light world, it’s a perfect sphere, and it spins rapidly in seemingly every direction (rather like kundalini and crown). This makes sense, because I have seen the chakra from ‘outside myself’ as well and it does exactly that. (Its placement is slightly lower than the middle of the forehead, with the middle of it being right about through the bone of the forehead.)

The seventh chakra (crown) is violet. By this I mean very bright purple mixed with white and rare slightly darker shades of purple — it changes constantly — a lot of white just due to intensity. Although I have wondered, while looking at the list of the platonic solids, if this fits the “icosahedron,” there is some part of me that actually thinks that has way too few facets. The “thousand petal’d lotus” don’t the Buddhists call it? It could be. But it spins all over so fast I couldn’t really see the facets, I only knew they were there, and it is so bright it’s magical. I didn’t fear the power of its energy the way I did kundalini’s. But its energy was super thin and super clearing or cleansing and it took me a long time to get through cleaning out the energy of my head with it, like the line of it was as fine as a piano wire.

The feet/ankles and hands/wrists in this world are amazing, tons and tons of different colors all near each other, like a whole collection of multicolored small gems each lit from the inside. The shoulders/elbows and hips/knees are fascinating and odd like some version of yin/yang, with two different energies moving just near and around each other never quite touching but definitely interacting like dancing.

The tunnel above my heart, is a perfectly round tunnel cave found halfway up the side of a mountain in that world. The Four and I sometimes meet there and sit in the edge of the front side or on the ledge behind the back side and look out over the landscape as we talk.

I mention all this partly because I suspect the shapes I perceive them as, has some specific meaning. I have looked at the symbols, online, that old traditions use for these chakras. I don’t know what it means but I don’t see any relation to my experience in the shape-symbols given. I am pretty sure this is meaningful though, and I don’t yet know why, so I include the info partly for my own reference (for posterity).

X. Chakras: relationships, communications, and realities

I have a bit of a “turbulent” relationship with Konewa Turi. I am torn between wanting KT (almost carnally) and wanting that light all through me, versus being frustrated at the so far two major experiences with him-her-them-it that hurt me. (I went to ‘have it out with’ KT after one such experience not long ago, after my heart attack, saying what have you done??, and he showed me the chakra gems-of-light world as ‘me,’ and then showed it to me as a 3D map with sketching on it, and he had red pen and pencil, engineering writing and text, arrows and all kinds of “detailed plans” that were “what he did” as part of it. I had other questions but he basically ‘pushed me out the door’ and didn’t talk to me about it anymore. I think my attitude was bad and they just weren’t having it.)

Mind you I’ve had plenty of typical experiences that are merely what I call flushes — the energy rises and either is paralyzing (rare, though I suspect this is the most powerful), or most the time for me just makes all the other chakras feel incredibly ‘excited’ and sends warmth up to the forehead briefly. The two I refer to above were really ‘major’ things that in the first case, gave me the worst 24 hours of my life followed by 2+ years of surreality I was lucky to escape a straightjacket during, and the latter was pleasant followed by the worst week of my life health-wise I’m lucky to have survived, and this was recent.

Using some solo-tantric approaches, which I say like I have any idea what I’m doing — I just made them up — I find if I focus on an Aeon and then get myself to a high near-point and then just leave it, later in the evening if I then meditate with that Aeon, I can get incredibly close to them. Sometimes I just focus on something I want or a part of me and then when the completion comes — a bit before, you have to ‘grab’ the energy for that — I send/allow the energy to go to that. You know when this works because the energy literally vanishes. I mean it’s quite weird. Like it’s at max peak one instant and utterly gone the next instant. You could have been making a spreadsheet or mowing the lawn or something, for all the sexual feeling you have at that point, like it never was. The chakras all love K’s energy though and if they had their way I would focus it up through them every time.

Every chakra has its own communication style. There is a feel to it, although it is subtle. The heart has almost its own language. I have noticed that some viewing data specifically has the ‘feel’ that I get from communication with a certain chakra. For example, my 2nd chakra, lower part of it, has a ‘feel’ that fairly well matches what I feel in me when I sense ‘stone’ in a target. I don’t know why, unless stone is somehow on a frequency line with that chakra.

Speaking of viewing, every chakra is the interface for a bandwidth/spectrum of energy that is its own reality.  (Probably infinite realities, but all in that ‘bandwidth.’) The reality that is closest to ‘real’ over ‘here,’ or so I am repeatedly told by more than one interworlds identity, is basically an overlap of heart chakra and solar plexus chakra. Technically, our center is the heart chakra. But the heart has ‘concept’ data, and the SP has ‘relationship’ data, and the two overlapping have “context” data, which is critical if viewing isn’t just to be a random collection of phrases.

The understanding of reality matters here because data from other chakras directly, particularly ajna (forehead) which most people default to because we are sight-centered as a culture and because people refer to it as ‘remote viewing’ after all, is not identical to ours. It’s very similar. Not identical. So you can get incredibly specific, clear-as-day data thanks to that chakra — and it can be wrong. It’s one thing to be wrong due to not being on-target, or mistranslating. It’s another to be on target and get super clear data and be wrong because then you’re like “Where the hell did that come from?!” Well it came from that reality which is not yours. So we have to keep re-focusing at the bottom-of-chest level (where heart and solar plus just touch) to stay in the zone that best matches our own reality, for viewing data.

XI. The alleged light-body

I saw a quote recently that suggested that eventually one wouldn’t so much have separate chakras, as an overall ‘light body’ that was all one-thing.

I don’t know anything about that.

I guess I am not there yet.

P

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