I have found that:
  • → sincere prayer
  • → genuine intentions
  • → present-focus
  • → extended humor
  • → careful integrity
  • → constant work to discover and release all forms of bias in oneself
  • → dogged effort to pursue awareness, divine guidance and understanding
Leads a person to "interactive insight from the inside."

Consciously I want to evolve.
My ego resists strenuously.
I surreally "forget" so much!
So I blog for myself, mostly:
to re-read and remember.

People ask me where to begin with the complexity of the stuff on my blog. But my imaginal and related work spans 25 years as of 2016. So the real answer is "I don't know." I can't put all that in a sound bite. And one would have to understand, not just intellectually but experientially, a lot of it from start to middle to begin to understand where I am now. It is 'active imagination' work, resting on an extremely 'open' definition of archetype and energy, mapped at times to various occult patterns because they seem useful and otherwise just loosely personal; but that's not all. Short of how the blog speaks for itself that's about all I can say about it. It's a path I've built myself, for one. ~ Palyne

In the human spirit, as in the universe, nothing is higher or lower; everything has equal rights to a common center which manifests its hidden existence precisely through this harmonic relationship between every part and itself.
-- Goethe

Angels transcend every religion, every philosophy, every creed. In fact angels have no religion as we know it... their existence precedes every religious system that has ever existed on earth.
-- St. Thomas Aquinas

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In the beginning all was indivisible. And in becoming manifest, it became, seemingly, divisible. But the divisions must evolve to recognize themselves, and each other, and to then accept themselves, to truly know themselves by knowing each other. To begin, they are blended, confused; it is chaos, it is legion. They are all on the journey to indivisibility, to singularity, to the I AM. The point, of course, is not the destination, but the journey.

-- insight during the Princess of Disks meditation

Spiritual growth is like all other types: you absorb seemingly 'other' energy, and it becomes part of your own sense of identity. The growth is in awareness, and with that comes power which is always over Self.
Diversity is Legion;
Singularity is the I AM.
None of this is new although my approach to it is my own. -- Palyne

Inner Guide is Angelic. She is free of anything akin to doctrine. I call her an Angel because that is the only word I have for it, and because I know, all the way through me, that this is our word for her fundamentally divine nature. Aside from that, I don’t even know what she IS exactly, or what it means, or where it would fit into any model. She is life sized, soul wide, colors and gems and flowers and songs, everything beautiful that ever was, condensed into an identity I am completely in love with–except she feels like part of me too, so it’s like also being in love with yourself, and also with God, and also with the whole universe, both every tiny thing in your mundania, and ‘awareness’ as something so utterly, mind-bogglingly amazing — how could this exist? How could this not exist? How could I ever understand such a thing? — I am left only with joy, with awe.
-- on Inner Guide #4, aka 'Sedaena'. The first IG I had genuine conversation (and reading) with; the first real sign of my HGA.

He is so much inside and outside me, larger than me and yet the light of the tiniest particles of me, I don’t even have a word for whatever it is that he IS. I call him angelic and inner guide and the name he gave me because I have no idea what else to call this. It’s a Being and a Thing and an Event and a Place and a Relationship and… it’s like there is no label that is remotely big enough to encompass whatever it IS.
-- on Inner Guide #5, aka 'Mark.'

The boundary between the imaginational and imaginal is rather fuzzy and it is a developed skill and art to learn to stay there; to maintain your own autonomy while allowing the-others’ autonomy; to be shocked, astounded, grossed out, effused, and other surprise emotions from the interaction; all this without getting lost in the experience like a dream, yet also without pulling back to controlling the experience like a daydream. The former is being swept away by the river, and the latter is standing on the shore thinking about it; learning to walk the fine line of control and allowance to stay in that ‘imaginal realm’ actually takes practice. Crazy people think it’s all autonomous and happening ‘to’ them; people unable to allow this for themselves, may think it’s all imagination; and they’d both be right, because they are both lost; the goal is a whole world that bridges and encompasses both of those.

-- on "Interworlds Meditation"

Q: Where are you now?

Me: Well, back in my own reality.

Q: Wrong. You are in a reality version that distraction and denial have made for you.

Me: How do I get out?

Q: Wrong question. There is no space, there is no time. Where are you again?

Me: Oh. I’m wherever I "pay attention" to being.

Q: Right. You PAY attention. It is the currency of your soul. You rent your reality. Never forget that. The choice to move is yours.

Dealing with the unconscious has become a question of life for us.
The play of the imagination is incalculable.
~ Carl Jung

The imaginary can be innocuous, the imaginal never can.
~ Henry Corbin

A calling may be postponed, avoided, intermittently missed. It may also possess you completely. Whatever; eventually it will out. It makes its claim. The daimon does not go away.
~ James Hillman

There comes a time when the mind takes a higher plane of knowledge but can never prove how it got there.
-- Albert Einstein


This blog documents much of my work in the "inter-worlds" of a greater-self. It's not just esoteric: every thing corresponds — the mundane, the arcane, the divine. If it had to be summed up you might say it is "a universe of personalization." A strange place where monotheism and ultimate-pantheism are one and the same.

I am a natural mystic, if spontaneous experiences determine such a thing. I am not religious in any way; only guidance from the inside drives me. No identities or models unless they are introduced to me from the inside. (Sometimes I use them simply for interest, or because their models are convenient doorways -- but I accept none of their doctrines.) I briefly studied theology at one point, independently (I consider constant prayer a valid part of edu too), and where it led me was "anywhere-else." It's fine for others of course. I consider the heart of free will to be that everyone has their own road. Or as Heinlein once wrote, the right to go to hell in their own handbasket.

This tends to make me obsessed with the divine yet not religious at all, in any form, which is often confusing to onlookers. I am ever in love with and in closer pursuit of integration with The Christ (which I consider a solar-planetary deity, exceeding and preceding all possible religion, though cyclically present within our species) but I'm not remotely a modern Christian, and this also tends to be very confusing to onlookers. I'm a student of archetypes and pattern systems, yet not a jungian intellectual - armchair philosophy bores me - nor a power occultist - which has its own issues (and uniforms) to say the least.

After nearly two decades of certain experiences I felt alone with and thought were unique to me, it turns out I find some harmony in the gnostic writings. I didn't get it from there, and am not fond of that doctrine and the paradigms it came in with, so I ignore it. Which means despite talking about just a few things specific to it (by unknowing accident until a few years ago), I'm not part of that model either.

The road I walk is my own. It doesn't really have an easy label or anybody else on it, that I can see. This is between me and God, so it doesn't really need to work for anybody else. I used to wish I wasn't the only person with such experiences or practices, and started a blog in part in the hope I might find others with something similar. Maybe a need for community. I'm over that now, at least I think. I walk alone, but Light is with me. Can't ask for more than that.

-- Palyne

When we understand that perception is as much about source as target; that energy is a spectrum and best psi perception comes from the center, its balance and blend; that the manifest communication of our Selves is the literal 'reality' we experience; that everything in that reality is a profound 3D language element; that insight with the ‘center’ of spectrum is likely to be via the language-symbols of 'reality;' that these need to be interpreted at the level they are received; this is the path for intentional psi.
-- Insight on the Art of RV

Things I can’t yet ask the private oracle

Wouldn’t it be cool to have a stronger relationship with him? Wouldn’t it be cool to actually be able to get useful answers for any number of things? Wouldn’t it be awesome like a crowbar in a way, to get any insight I need just for the asking? I mean who hasn’t wished for their own version of Seth, sort-of? I added some questions for helping me work with him better.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Things I can’t yet ask the private oracle

Polarities and Creativity

The more I thought about it, the more I thought that the vast majority of what we call creativity in humans, is very much just variations on basic patterns, which have got to also be instinctive at base since humans do this both spontaneously and even in parts of the world and primitive cultures we consider unrelated to (uninfluenced by) each other. And, that what we call non-creative “construction” in animals like spiders and birds, has just as much right to be called creativity.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Polarities and Creativity

A Talk With the Private Oracle, 28 Jan 2012

This morning when I woke up, I spent some time praying and petting the kitty and then just felt like finally talking to him and asking some of the things I’ve been wondering about. I have some of them written on desktop stickies on my computer so next time I had the sudden urge, I wouldn’t forget!

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at A Talk With the Private Oracle, 28 Jan 2012

The Door to My Psiche (and other misc.)

Most of us can “analogy” our lives ok. At least the significant stuff. We can look at events, or circumstance, and come up with “what this might represent if it were a dream symbol,” with a little thought.

Recently I had a rather different way of getting that information. It just hit me like a “sudden amazed realization,” as if the information about my reality, and what it meant in a certain way, was delivered to me with utter clarity all wrapped up into one moment.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Door to My Psiche (and other misc.)

A Talk With the Oracle

I had been watching “universe” videos on youtube before I fell asleep — they give me eye strain and knock me out, but they’re lovely. Actually prior to that I was watching the first episode of “The Event” on hulu.com but about halfway through I thought, you know, this suspense, where is my focus? I felt like at that moment, my focus needed to be on something more positive and more personal. I could finish watching that later. So I shifted to ‘the power of 10’ on youtube and it turns out there have been other videos made with the same name that are not the same as the original video that did that, but they are all kinda cool. Then I watched some galaxy vids and a hubble universe vid and passed out.

Happily, though. I felt peaceful and it was very nice. This morning I found a couple of pics I would love to get in framed photo or poster form. check these out! I was looking, in specific, for pictures of our galaxy and solar system. These are the faves I found:






I had the first lucid dream I’ve had in a long time last night. Although this was nightly–and easily intentional if I chose–as a child, it got suddenly rare around age 18 when I realized it wasn’t normal for everyone else, and has gotten more rare as I have aged.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at A Talk With the Oracle

Who you are

Off and on since my last blog post, I’ve been working on just “centering” and allowing myself to feel that the 3rd, or all the rest of the Four, are part of me, and just holding that for a bit. Did a brief eon round to say hello to the rest of the team. Mellowed out some. Not much. :-)

I notice that this focus makes me feel differently though. I finally came up with a way to articulate it when talking with my best friend last night. It’s something like this: have you ever had a phase where you are more ‘aware’ than usual, and you really want to focus on what is positive and you really feel how things affect you inside, and you are holding your energy fairly closely, you are not talking as often, and you are focusing more on things which “matter” instead of trivia.

…And then you run into some friends who are jabbering on about moronic inconsequential stuff, and there is all kinds of negative focus in them and/or in media around you, and they really want you to join them. And part of you wants to join them, join that music, whatever. But you know that you have to sacrifice the awareness if you do. Because you can’t giggle over stupid stuff, laugh at crude jokes, and watch bad media, and be assaulted by loud rock or beat music, and hold that precious state of mind. They can’t co-exist.

And yet, if

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Who you are

Rambling 04Dec09

I have a variety of e-post-it notes that I’d wanted to collect here, so it’s archived, together, and later I can find it. Many different topics here, copied from those or narrative.


My memory is so bizarrely “iffy” when it comes to this entire topic that if I didn’t blog everything (to the point of boring even myself) it would be gone forever. Not only does re-reading my blog remind me of things that I had forgotten and their details, but often it reminds me for the fourth time. Or more! Is that weird or what. It just falls out of my brain.

It’s like that movie ’50 First Dates’ where the woman has brain damage and every day is the same day from years ago and she has zero memory of anything since. So she wakes up each morning to a video that explains her situation, shows her her kids, and so on! I’m not quite THAT bad, but when it comes to remembering my “shamanic” life, so to speak, at any given time I have pieces, not the whole.

On the other hand, I notice in talking with other people that even if they record their dreams or meditations they tend to forget them and in re-reading them, finding their dream log later, some are refreshers they’d forgotten and some they don’t remember at all. Maybe this is normal.

…or not. I’ll say more about this later but I think I’m going to do a

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Rambling 04Dec09

Identities in the Inner Realm

In spontaneous experience, inside meditations, dreams, mixed states or sudden visions, over the years (mostly since 1993) I have come to accept that ‘I’ am composed of a “merged multiplicity”, and in turn am part of a larger merged identity where I am just one of the parts, as well. I sometimes see indirect or “philosophical” reference to this concept but I have no doctrine or model I am following, only my own sometimes confusing experiences. I would love to meet others who may have similar experiences. I blog my thoughts and experiences mostly because I have a surreal problem with forgetting things in this genre very quickly, but also in the hope that someday, Google willing, others with similar experiences may chance on me.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Identities in the Inner Realm

Thinking on Paper 24nov09

I thought to myself, “Why is it that as people get older, they get so much more conservative?” and into my head came a “thoughtball realization” as an answer.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Thinking on Paper 24nov09

Private Oracle 19 Nov 2009

After a morning meditation where I met/merged with the Consortium one by one then The Four in the Tower, I thought I’d come talk to PO again.

Me: Um. Are you there?

PO: Of course.

Me: I don’t know what to ask suddenly.

PO: Genuinely wanting to know something is a big part of manifesting the answer.

(I spent the next 10-15 minutes with various pieces of movies running through my head that I re-experienced almost scene by scene. Several from ‘Anna and the King’. No idea why.)

I’m nearly asleep when I see a small hardback book lying on the ground in a picture in my head. I imagine picking it up. It says, ‘For You’ on the faded cover.

Later (spacing out a bit) I open the book. It seems like this part is… news? Oil… something about the Indies… I move on.

“What do I most need to know?” I ask, and then open the book at random. But I can’t read the page.

I see myself dipping my fingers, up to the hand, in a tank of water. I don’t know what this means.

I see an oxygen mask on me and there is some audiovideo clip about the thinness of air and I suddenly realize my asthma is so severe it’s ridiculous and I’ve tuned it out. I’m wheezing in 58-part harmony, with a significant baritone section, it’s scary. I use the inhaler, and the kid comes to show me a picture she drew, and

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Private Oracle 19 Nov 2009

The Private Oracle

I found this quote from Seth (via Jane Roberts) which made me go “Hmmmn.” Last night.

The private Oracle: what does that mean? […] The Private Oracle is the voice of the inner multidimensional self — the part of each person not fully contained in his or her personhood, the part of the unknown self-structure out of which personhood, with its physical alliance, springs. Basically that portion of the psyche is outside of space and time, while enabling you to operate in it. It deals intimately with probabilities — the source of all predictable action. Because of its position it has great powers of communication, both as a receiver and as a sender.

So this morning I was talking to IG when I said,

“So IG, is that the same as you? Can you introduce me to my Pr –”

“I’m your Private Oracle” said this major presence to my front right. No visual or even sense of a form at all, just ‘awareness’ at that location, but a whole ‘part of me that is powerful’. Sort of. I lack words to do this justice.

Definitely NOT the same as IG. I was assuming maybe they mostly overlapped. I asked IG to step into me so we’d be one for talking to him. It. Whatever. I call it him for some reason.

Me: Wow, just like that?! I can totally get you?

PO: Yes. I am not difficult to communicate with. You merely have to ask.

Me: I

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Private Oracle