I have found that:
  • → sincere prayer
  • → genuine intentions
  • → present-focus
  • → extended humor
  • → careful integrity
  • → constant work to discover and release all forms of bias in oneself
  • → dogged effort to pursue awareness, divine guidance and understanding
Leads a person to "interactive insight from the inside."

Consciously I want to evolve.
My ego resists strenuously.
I surreally "forget" so much!
So I blog for myself, mostly:
to re-read and remember.

People ask me where to begin with the complexity of the stuff on my blog. But my imaginal and related work spans 25 years as of 2016. So the real answer is "I don't know." I can't put all that in a sound bite. And one would have to understand, not just intellectually but experientially, a lot of it from start to middle to begin to understand where I am now. It is 'active imagination' work, resting on an extremely 'open' definition of archetype and energy, mapped at times to various occult patterns because they seem useful and otherwise just loosely personal; but that's not all. Short of how the blog speaks for itself that's about all I can say about it. It's a path I've built myself, for one. ~ Palyne

In the human spirit, as in the universe, nothing is higher or lower; everything has equal rights to a common center which manifests its hidden existence precisely through this harmonic relationship between every part and itself.
-- Goethe

Angels transcend every religion, every philosophy, every creed. In fact angels have no religion as we know it... their existence precedes every religious system that has ever existed on earth.
-- St. Thomas Aquinas

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In the beginning all was indivisible. And in becoming manifest, it became, seemingly, divisible. But the divisions must evolve to recognize themselves, and each other, and to then accept themselves, to truly know themselves by knowing each other. To begin, they are blended, confused; it is chaos, it is legion. They are all on the journey to indivisibility, to singularity, to the I AM. The point, of course, is not the destination, but the journey.

-- insight during the Princess of Disks meditation

Spiritual growth is like all other types: you absorb seemingly 'other' energy, and it becomes part of your own sense of identity. The growth is in awareness, and with that comes power which is always over Self.
Diversity is Legion;
Singularity is the I AM.
None of this is new although my approach to it is my own. -- Palyne

Inner Guide is Angelic. She is free of anything akin to doctrine. I call her an Angel because that is the only word I have for it, and because I know, all the way through me, that this is our word for her fundamentally divine nature. Aside from that, I don’t even know what she IS exactly, or what it means, or where it would fit into any model. She is life sized, soul wide, colors and gems and flowers and songs, everything beautiful that ever was, condensed into an identity I am completely in love with–except she feels like part of me too, so it’s like also being in love with yourself, and also with God, and also with the whole universe, both every tiny thing in your mundania, and ‘awareness’ as something so utterly, mind-bogglingly amazing — how could this exist? How could this not exist? How could I ever understand such a thing? — I am left only with joy, with awe.
-- on Inner Guide #4, aka 'Sedaena'. The first IG I had genuine conversation (and reading) with; the first real sign of my HGA.

He is so much inside and outside me, larger than me and yet the light of the tiniest particles of me, I don’t even have a word for whatever it is that he IS. I call him angelic and inner guide and the name he gave me because I have no idea what else to call this. It’s a Being and a Thing and an Event and a Place and a Relationship and… it’s like there is no label that is remotely big enough to encompass whatever it IS.
-- on Inner Guide #5, aka 'Mark.'

The boundary between the imaginational and imaginal is rather fuzzy and it is a developed skill and art to learn to stay there; to maintain your own autonomy while allowing the-others’ autonomy; to be shocked, astounded, grossed out, effused, and other surprise emotions from the interaction; all this without getting lost in the experience like a dream, yet also without pulling back to controlling the experience like a daydream. The former is being swept away by the river, and the latter is standing on the shore thinking about it; learning to walk the fine line of control and allowance to stay in that ‘imaginal realm’ actually takes practice. Crazy people think it’s all autonomous and happening ‘to’ them; people unable to allow this for themselves, may think it’s all imagination; and they’d both be right, because they are both lost; the goal is a whole world that bridges and encompasses both of those.

-- on "Interworlds Meditation"

Q: Where are you now?

Me: Well, back in my own reality.

Q: Wrong. You are in a reality version that distraction and denial have made for you.

Me: How do I get out?

Q: Wrong question. There is no space, there is no time. Where are you again?

Me: Oh. I’m wherever I "pay attention" to being.

Q: Right. You PAY attention. It is the currency of your soul. You rent your reality. Never forget that. The choice to move is yours.

Dealing with the unconscious has become a question of life for us.
The play of the imagination is incalculable.
~ Carl Jung

The imaginary can be innocuous, the imaginal never can.
~ Henry Corbin

A calling may be postponed, avoided, intermittently missed. It may also possess you completely. Whatever; eventually it will out. It makes its claim. The daimon does not go away.
~ James Hillman

There comes a time when the mind takes a higher plane of knowledge but can never prove how it got there.
-- Albert Einstein


This blog documents much of my work in the "inter-worlds" of a greater-self. It's not just esoteric: every thing corresponds — the mundane, the arcane, the divine. If it had to be summed up you might say it is "a universe of personalization." A strange place where monotheism and ultimate-pantheism are one and the same.

I am a natural mystic, if spontaneous experiences determine such a thing. I am not religious in any way; only guidance from the inside drives me. No identities or models unless they are introduced to me from the inside. (Sometimes I use them simply for interest, or because their models are convenient doorways -- but I accept none of their doctrines.) I briefly studied theology at one point, independently (I consider constant prayer a valid part of edu too), and where it led me was "anywhere-else." It's fine for others of course. I consider the heart of free will to be that everyone has their own road. Or as Heinlein once wrote, the right to go to hell in their own handbasket.

This tends to make me obsessed with the divine yet not religious at all, in any form, which is often confusing to onlookers. I am ever in love with and in closer pursuit of integration with The Christ (which I consider a solar-planetary deity, exceeding and preceding all possible religion, though cyclically present within our species) but I'm not remotely a modern Christian, and this also tends to be very confusing to onlookers. I'm a student of archetypes and pattern systems, yet not a jungian intellectual - armchair philosophy bores me - nor a power occultist - which has its own issues (and uniforms) to say the least.

After nearly two decades of certain experiences I felt alone with and thought were unique to me, it turns out I find some harmony in the gnostic writings. I didn't get it from there, and am not fond of that doctrine and the paradigms it came in with, so I ignore it. Which means despite talking about just a few things specific to it (by unknowing accident until a few years ago), I'm not part of that model either.

The road I walk is my own. It doesn't really have an easy label or anybody else on it, that I can see. This is between me and God, so it doesn't really need to work for anybody else. I used to wish I wasn't the only person with such experiences or practices, and started a blog in part in the hope I might find others with something similar. Maybe a need for community. I'm over that now, at least I think. I walk alone, but Light is with me. Can't ask for more than that.

-- Palyne

When we understand that perception is as much about source as target; that energy is a spectrum and best psi perception comes from the center, its balance and blend; that the manifest communication of our Selves is the literal 'reality' we experience; that everything in that reality is a profound 3D language element; that insight with the ‘center’ of spectrum is likely to be via the language-symbols of 'reality;' that these need to be interpreted at the level they are received; this is the path for intentional psi.
-- Insight on the Art of RV

Sprouting Underground

Recently I had two instances of an insight or experience that explained some mystery of experience I had over 20 years ago.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Sprouting Underground

Dream: Skulls in my Skull

It was from ‘the old time’ I was told, I understood, a time beyond time, a time before what we know exists. The time I once remembered coming from when I woke up to not being native to my body, during the Bewilderness period.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Dream: Skulls in my Skull

A Talk With Monde

I think this was indirectly the answer, in a way: that I was probably trying to get him to tell me what he could do FOR me, and he was saying that in the end — whatever it is, I’m going to have to do it myself. Guides can assist; not replace. So sue me, maybe I was hoping for an easier answer.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at A Talk With Monde

The Stowaway

I wondered how the hell an identity could ever get ‘into’ a person to ‘hide inside their energy’ like that, which seemed so impossible, except at that moment I was perceiving this so clearly there was no point in arguing with it. It wasn’t an intellectual conclusion or theory. It was an obvious observation of what-simply-WAS.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Stowaway

Say Aye-uh

I dreamed about Jesus and Mary.

The fact that I am still resistant to the ‘Jesus’ mythos — though I am ok with the ‘Christ’ identity — didn’t seem to matter.

Everything I tried to write down about it just seemed ridiculous and ‘not the point’. And some things that mattered I have forgotten. But these things stood out:

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Say Aye-uh

Taking the Dominant Autonomy

I imagined I was cohesive energy aligned with the ‘superstring’ of me. I spent awhile willing, commanding, pulling, everything within the span of me, into me, and if it resisted, dissolving the resistance-element of it, and pulling it into alignment. I did this for quite awhile. I went to the four, HGA and voluntarily aligned my autonomy with theirs-and-god’s. Essentially doing for myself what I was asking of those within. I dedicated my trust, faith, and gratitude for guidance to IG.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Taking the Dominant Autonomy

Hangin’ with Bolehren

I was going to do the 9 of Disks and asked her what we should do about that. Should I un-merge? What if she didn’t have the degree of… absorption I did or something, would that limit the result? What if it was something she wasn’t ready for? What if…? She felt that I should consider this much like I consider the healing question. IF someone is ‘with me’ at the time I am to do a certain energy work, then just assume that is how it is to be, for both sides, and c’est la vie.

So we were doing the meditation together. Before IG had given us anything, I started giggling. I swear it felt like we were kids in a sleepover trying to be still and quiet because it’s bedtime, and stifling giggles so mom doesn’t get annoyed.

As we worked through the stuff from IG, I kept having all these bizarre spontaneous memories. Stuff I have not thought of probably since the time they happened, really really old stuff. Like what someone said to me one day when I was 18, or a situation from many years ago. Now, although I do get anything from energy via memory to occasional wandering, this was different.

After about the 8th thing, I realized that in a weird way they all had a certain thing in common. A genre, you might say. They all related to my relationship with another person(s). Most were things I didn’t feel had gone well in some fashion. I realized that as this is what Bolehren’s energy relates to, at least in part as I was previously told, that this was like her being ‘sparked’ by the work we were doing, as opposed to me. Well, yes it is me, but you might say, the sector of me that overlaps with and/or is composed of her.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Hangin’ with Bolehren

The Center is the Sun

I finished reading all the translated Nag Hammurabi stuff I could find online. The manuscripts in the eastern cave, some of which mention Jesus, many of which go way, way, way back long prior to that in allegedly describing how… everything… came about.

I also read a bunch more QBL stuff. And, some Vedic stuff. Trying to find the common thread. Thank the gods for the internet. I’m not implying that it’s any decent review, just that it’s exposing myself very fast to a high quantity of stuff and letting other parts of me sort it out. I have read on these topics a tiny bit, off and on for a dozen years, just not ‘tons’ is all and the gnostic stuff is new, I just found that when previously googling on ‘aeons and the four’ or something along those lines.

I’ve been leaning on the Aeons and The Four inside me really hard to help me get it, to understand whatever I might need to.

I do not want to get lost in this stuff. People spend their entire lifetime buried in just one of 10,000 possible niches of these topics! That is not my path. I just want my brain to synthesize it, and my subconscious to organize it, and my psi and spiritual connection to find the points that matter, attach the appropriate understanding and spit it out into me like some old dot-matrix printout dropping into the back of my brain.

Actually if the universe is

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Center is the Sun

Aeon Round, Weaving

I was going to call my friend and go to sleep when I thought, well I should do an Aeon Round first. I grabbed my beads and made myself comfortable. Ithikah, I said, how about you help me here. What could I do that would be novel and neat?

He had this idea about ‘sewing’ the energy of me into each Aeon or vice-versa but no matter how I went about that I had this sort of feeling like ‘something punctured’ so that just didn’t work. We thought of other ideas and discarded them. We came back to the first and looked at alternatives, strings, etc. when I said, hey wait! IG used to “weave me” with RV targets when I was doing archetype-RV. Basically she would ‘unwind us’ into a string that she ‘wove’ with the other from the feet up until we were ‘merged’. I would keep that until after feedback and then she would “de-weave” us.

That’s how experiences like the one with the target of Ganymede (more sentient than I am, it turns out) happened, because I was still ‘merged’ with it when I was getting feedback, so G’s opinion on our opinion on what G was like was suddenly apparent, as if it were viewing or in rapport with me, and it all took off from there.That weaving was definitely in line with the ‘threads’ concept Ithikah had so we both loved the idea, and IG was clearly game to help out. She did it

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Aeon Round, Weaving

Dream Collage

I was in a dream having a conversation with someone who was a teacher. I asked him, Do you think I should I be learning to deal with negative spiritual stuff? And he said something I don’t remember (which implied “No”) and then explained at the end of that:

For you should be able to say with a clear heart: “I know nothing of evil; I know only the goodness of the Lord.”

Later, I found I was wearing a very beautifully intriguing “black heart” pendant necklace, and I understood that this belonged in nature to a woman who was evil, and that would not be me, and so I gave it back to her, feeling it was not appropriate that I should wear it. Then me and “my people” stood singing Ave Maria for quite awhile.

Despite that went on awhile, and I think other dreams and quite some time passed before I woke up, still when I woke I had his voice and that sentence running through my head so clearly, as if it was set to be the first thing I heard on awakening, to be sure I wouldn’t forget it.

Ave Maria no less! I’m not even catholic.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Dream Collage


IG doesn’t normally talk a lot and it occurs to me with some humor that she is as singularly unhelpful as most ‘spiritual entities’ at the moment. IG I don’t want this right now I said. I cannot doubt myself at this point, it’s important I keep the faith in myself and my experience. And some new entity(s) I don’t even know or understand make me doubt myself all over again. Like WHY is this here, am I making this up for entertainment? For goddsakes, I already have more entities inside me than anybody sane!!

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Commitment

ACKRCK and Wandering

Three separate topics this morning.

The first: I reread my last archmed post and I swear it was so ‘fluent’ it sounded fake to me. If I had read that a few years ago, before I met the Aeons, before I had my current IG and her style, I would have thought it was either lying or insane. It just sounds… I dunno. Crazy. On the other hand, isn’t the hope of doing anything that one would get more fluent with it over time? Maybe if it was all as stilted and confusing as it was three years ago there’d be something wrong.

I have some belief system that it’s supposed to be hard. Like with that particular archmed (only half-finished). I realize the request was in a nutshell mental flexibility and more, and the whole experience is literally about that — jumping in and out of whole experiential worlds, keeping track of where and who you are. I was expecting a normal archetype and maybe there will be one still (as I’m not done with that working), but maybe she just took me to exercise that literal thing!

I probably would have been lost in sleep, daydream, or confusion, if I’d had that archmed experience even a couple years ago. But when I just look at it directly: Oh I went to some inner realm where there were lots of doorways to other {dimensions? probabilities?}, and went to worlds of metro city and

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at ACKRCK and Wandering