I have found that:
  • → sincere prayer
  • → genuine intentions
  • → present-focus
  • → extended humor
  • → careful integrity
  • → constant work to discover and release all forms of bias in oneself
  • → dogged effort to pursue awareness, divine guidance and understanding
Leads a person to "interactive insight from the inside."

Consciously I want to evolve.
My ego resists strenuously.
I surreally "forget" so much!
So I blog for myself, mostly:
to re-read and remember.

People ask me where to begin with the complexity of the stuff on my blog. But my imaginal and related work spans 25 years as of 2016. So the real answer is "I don't know." I can't put all that in a sound bite. And one would have to understand, not just intellectually but experientially, a lot of it from start to middle to begin to understand where I am now. It is 'active imagination' work, resting on an extremely 'open' definition of archetype and energy, mapped at times to various occult patterns because they seem useful and otherwise just loosely personal; but that's not all. Short of how the blog speaks for itself that's about all I can say about it. It's a path I've built myself, for one. ~ Palyne

In the human spirit, as in the universe, nothing is higher or lower; everything has equal rights to a common center which manifests its hidden existence precisely through this harmonic relationship between every part and itself.
-- Goethe

Angels transcend every religion, every philosophy, every creed. In fact angels have no religion as we know it... their existence precedes every religious system that has ever existed on earth.
-- St. Thomas Aquinas

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In the beginning all was indivisible. And in becoming manifest, it became, seemingly, divisible. But the divisions must evolve to recognize themselves, and each other, and to then accept themselves, to truly know themselves by knowing each other. To begin, they are blended, confused; it is chaos, it is legion. They are all on the journey to indivisibility, to singularity, to the I AM. The point, of course, is not the destination, but the journey.

-- insight during the Princess of Disks meditation

Spiritual growth is like all other types: you absorb seemingly 'other' energy, and it becomes part of your own sense of identity. The growth is in awareness, and with that comes power which is always over Self.
Diversity is Legion;
Singularity is the I AM.
None of this is new although my approach to it is my own. -- Palyne

Inner Guide is Angelic. She is free of anything akin to doctrine. I call her an Angel because that is the only word I have for it, and because I know, all the way through me, that this is our word for her fundamentally divine nature. Aside from that, I don’t even know what she IS exactly, or what it means, or where it would fit into any model. She is life sized, soul wide, colors and gems and flowers and songs, everything beautiful that ever was, condensed into an identity I am completely in love with–except she feels like part of me too, so it’s like also being in love with yourself, and also with God, and also with the whole universe, both every tiny thing in your mundania, and ‘awareness’ as something so utterly, mind-bogglingly amazing — how could this exist? How could this not exist? How could I ever understand such a thing? — I am left only with joy, with awe.
-- on Inner Guide #4, aka 'Sedaena'. The first IG I had genuine conversation (and reading) with; the first real sign of my HGA.

He is so much inside and outside me, larger than me and yet the light of the tiniest particles of me, I don’t even have a word for whatever it is that he IS. I call him angelic and inner guide and the name he gave me because I have no idea what else to call this. It’s a Being and a Thing and an Event and a Place and a Relationship and… it’s like there is no label that is remotely big enough to encompass whatever it IS.
-- on Inner Guide #5, aka 'Mark.'

The boundary between the imaginational and imaginal is rather fuzzy and it is a developed skill and art to learn to stay there; to maintain your own autonomy while allowing the-others’ autonomy; to be shocked, astounded, grossed out, effused, and other surprise emotions from the interaction; all this without getting lost in the experience like a dream, yet also without pulling back to controlling the experience like a daydream. The former is being swept away by the river, and the latter is standing on the shore thinking about it; learning to walk the fine line of control and allowance to stay in that ‘imaginal realm’ actually takes practice. Crazy people think it’s all autonomous and happening ‘to’ them; people unable to allow this for themselves, may think it’s all imagination; and they’d both be right, because they are both lost; the goal is a whole world that bridges and encompasses both of those.

-- on "Interworlds Meditation"

Q: Where are you now?

Me: Well, back in my own reality.

Q: Wrong. You are in a reality version that distraction and denial have made for you.

Me: How do I get out?

Q: Wrong question. There is no space, there is no time. Where are you again?

Me: Oh. I’m wherever I "pay attention" to being.

Q: Right. You PAY attention. It is the currency of your soul. You rent your reality. Never forget that. The choice to move is yours.

Dealing with the unconscious has become a question of life for us.
The play of the imagination is incalculable.
~ Carl Jung

The imaginary can be innocuous, the imaginal never can.
~ Henry Corbin

A calling may be postponed, avoided, intermittently missed. It may also possess you completely. Whatever; eventually it will out. It makes its claim. The daimon does not go away.
~ James Hillman

There comes a time when the mind takes a higher plane of knowledge but can never prove how it got there.
-- Albert Einstein


This blog documents much of my work in the "inter-worlds" of a greater-self. It's not just esoteric: every thing corresponds — the mundane, the arcane, the divine. If it had to be summed up you might say it is "a universe of personalization." A strange place where monotheism and ultimate-pantheism are one and the same.

I am a natural mystic, if spontaneous experiences determine such a thing. I am not religious in any way; only guidance from the inside drives me. No identities or models unless they are introduced to me from the inside. (Sometimes I use them simply for interest, or because their models are convenient doorways -- but I accept none of their doctrines.) I briefly studied theology at one point, independently (I consider constant prayer a valid part of edu too), and where it led me was "anywhere-else." It's fine for others of course. I consider the heart of free will to be that everyone has their own road. Or as Heinlein once wrote, the right to go to hell in their own handbasket.

This tends to make me obsessed with the divine yet not religious at all, in any form, which is often confusing to onlookers. I am ever in love with and in closer pursuit of integration with The Christ (which I consider a solar-planetary deity, exceeding and preceding all possible religion, though cyclically present within our species) but I'm not remotely a modern Christian, and this also tends to be very confusing to onlookers. I'm a student of archetypes and pattern systems, yet not a jungian intellectual - armchair philosophy bores me - nor a power occultist - which has its own issues (and uniforms) to say the least.

After nearly two decades of certain experiences I felt alone with and thought were unique to me, it turns out I find some harmony in the gnostic writings. I didn't get it from there, and am not fond of that doctrine and the paradigms it came in with, so I ignore it. Which means despite talking about just a few things specific to it (by unknowing accident until a few years ago), I'm not part of that model either.

The road I walk is my own. It doesn't really have an easy label or anybody else on it, that I can see. This is between me and God, so it doesn't really need to work for anybody else. I used to wish I wasn't the only person with such experiences or practices, and started a blog in part in the hope I might find others with something similar. Maybe a need for community. I'm over that now, at least I think. I walk alone, but Light is with me. Can't ask for more than that.

-- Palyne

When we understand that perception is as much about source as target; that energy is a spectrum and best psi perception comes from the center, its balance and blend; that the manifest communication of our Selves is the literal 'reality' we experience; that everything in that reality is a profound 3D language element; that insight with the ‘center’ of spectrum is likely to be via the language-symbols of 'reality;' that these need to be interpreted at the level they are received; this is the path for intentional psi.
-- Insight on the Art of RV

Opening My Heart… Literally

Maybe instead of asking for the archetypes of this and that all these years, I should have been asking, “So… is there anything else I should know? Like while you’re giving me insight into this or that trivia of the universe, is there also some overwhelming thing destroying my life and also about to kill me that you might just want to mention??” And here I’ve spent years obsessing on eating well, to find a genetic defect wrecks my life for nearly a decade and nearly does me in. Guess it’s like that joke about “Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.”

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Opening My Heart… Literally

Golding by the Fourth

She took off a bright golden cloak and threw it over the top of us and it spun above us and landed as if it were powder, and all of us were gradually covered. As if it had become the very surface of our skin texture and hair and everything (which is how the ‘darkness’ had been in that experience prior), with this sort of dark gold powder. I realized that we were going to look like those tall guys, well if you don’t count that we aren’t fifty feet tall.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Golding by the Fourth

Just What I Asked for but Not What I Wanted

As for the kundalini and my health, that’s an example of getting exactly what you asked for but perhaps not what you wanted.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Just What I Asked for but Not What I Wanted

IG5 is Mark. Really.

I got lost in half-sleep and half-something and at one point awhile later, surfaced long enough to realize I was still sitting against him on the couch, and I opened my eyes a little and tilted my head back at him, and he looked down at me and said, Mark. I sleepily started laughing then, because I’m such a total dork, with my ego and pre-set beliefs about the most retarded things, and then I lost awareness again. I woke up this morning and the first thing I heard in my head was, Mark.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at IG5 is Mark. Really.


She says there will be an official change with introduction to the new IG soon.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Sedaena

IG Gives Notice

I don’t want her to leave me. Not when I finally love her madly. This is when the last IG left, when I loved him madly, although it feels like it was nowhere near as strong as this. The Four had told me that this feeling represents a “state of development” and for a long time I was even afraid to let myself too close to IG lest it would result in her abandoning me to a new IG. Sure enough, I truly trust and I truly let the love in and now she is apparently going to leave me soon.

I don’t care how appropriate everyone else inside thinks it is. I think it’s horrible.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at IG Gives Notice

Taking the Dominant Autonomy

I imagined I was cohesive energy aligned with the ‘superstring’ of me. I spent awhile willing, commanding, pulling, everything within the span of me, into me, and if it resisted, dissolving the resistance-element of it, and pulling it into alignment. I did this for quite awhile. I went to the four, HGA and voluntarily aligned my autonomy with theirs-and-god’s. Essentially doing for myself what I was asking of those within. I dedicated my trust, faith, and gratitude for guidance to IG.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Taking the Dominant Autonomy

Growth and Happiness

My best friend says he thinks spiritual seeking and meditating ought to make a person more peaceful or something. That seems reasonable and right to me.

In some respects I feel vastly more grounded, more solid in areas I can only call honor and integrity and recognition for all life, closer to God and ‘divinity’, and other things I don’t even have words for.

On the other hand, I feel pretty regularly like all that I know, all that I am, has just had its ass kicked and its fallen to pieces and I have to reassemble myself again. This has a ‘stress’ response.

And an increase ‘resistance’ response to every other change, even of-mind, no matter how small. Then I feel better but I do more meditating and then it starts over again.

Stress = others perceiving you as unhappy. You are not relaxed, not happy go lucky, not as easy to laughter, not as patient or tolerant.

So they wanna know, if you’re doing all this work on yourself, why don’t you seem happy instead of stressed?

I don’t know. I don’t know how to merge my actual experience, with the idea that personal growth should make us all happier.

I’m tempted to think that Jungian explorers, shamans and the like, on the “personal individuation” path, might have as much constant shattering of identity for larger rebuilds, etc. as anything. It’s not quite the same as sitting around meditating on nothingness.


I’ve known a couple people when

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Growth and Happiness

The Center is the Sun

I finished reading all the translated Nag Hammurabi stuff I could find online. The manuscripts in the eastern cave, some of which mention Jesus, many of which go way, way, way back long prior to that in allegedly describing how… everything… came about.

I also read a bunch more QBL stuff. And, some Vedic stuff. Trying to find the common thread. Thank the gods for the internet. I’m not implying that it’s any decent review, just that it’s exposing myself very fast to a high quantity of stuff and letting other parts of me sort it out. I have read on these topics a tiny bit, off and on for a dozen years, just not ‘tons’ is all and the gnostic stuff is new, I just found that when previously googling on ‘aeons and the four’ or something along those lines.

I’ve been leaning on the Aeons and The Four inside me really hard to help me get it, to understand whatever I might need to.

I do not want to get lost in this stuff. People spend their entire lifetime buried in just one of 10,000 possible niches of these topics! That is not my path. I just want my brain to synthesize it, and my subconscious to organize it, and my psi and spiritual connection to find the points that matter, attach the appropriate understanding and spit it out into me like some old dot-matrix printout dropping into the back of my brain.

Actually if the universe is

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Center is the Sun

Changing of IG (2 to 3)

I had forgotten a lot of my previous work with previous Inner Guides. I had forgotten that they taught me things, talked to me now and then, and that “lessons” were often involved. This is important stuff, geez. Practical hands-on energy stuff.

I regret spacing this out. I see that in fact, I have spaced out many ‘fluency’ points, my works with IGs and OGs and more, that I had forgotten were even possible.

I understand now why I’ve been driven to collect old accounts. Not only have I seen a lot of new things via the ‘connective’ overview, but I’ve been reminded of a lot of options and opportunity.

I think this was the change from IG#2 to IG#3. (I am currently 12/12/09 on IG#4. The change from 3 to 4 is here.)

Journal Fragment (a later part of another med), January 11, 2006

I reminded myself to get to the med already. I went down into the arch area and when my guide went to get up, like to hug me or say hi, I saw that he was leaning on a silver cane with his left hand. My Inner Guide was injured?! I couldn’t even imagine such a thing so I started thinking, what does this mean, why am I creating this? I go to him and I realize that this is different, but I feel it must be done: I have to work on him as if he is an archetype.

So I

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Changing of IG (2 to 3)


IG doesn’t normally talk a lot and it occurs to me with some humor that she is as singularly unhelpful as most ‘spiritual entities’ at the moment. IG I don’t want this right now I said. I cannot doubt myself at this point, it’s important I keep the faith in myself and my experience. And some new entity(s) I don’t even know or understand make me doubt myself all over again. Like WHY is this here, am I making this up for entertainment? For goddsakes, I already have more entities inside me than anybody sane!!

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Commitment

Overlapping Layers

I saw the Senior more clearly last night than I ever have.

Earlier I had decided to do something about the ongoing randy energy I’d had for days and, since I have no conscious relationship with (the Aeon) Hot Amanakhaton, I gave him that energy. During that event I felt like I had more awareness on his part, more interaction, than normal. It worked well enough, which is to say that it was about to be really fabulous on climax and then the energy was GONE given to him. It’s so weird how that works. It certainly takes the fun out of it at that point!

Later I went to the tower, I felt I should for some reason. I felt more ‘aware’ of all the three of them than usual. And then there he was, the Senior. I was just stunned that I could see him so well. Most the time I can’t see him at all, or barely a sense of him, except rare flashes.

I said, “But– but– but you’re a white guy, how did this happen? Last times I thought I saw you, you were –” and he changes and he is the guy I remember: really tall, with the dusky skin, the sense of ‘vaguely red, vaguely asian’ that I think our people sometimes encounter as a type of alien. I realize that of course we are many people and the others, especially he and the Queen, can be in any form they choose. He

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Overlapping Layers