I have found that:
  • → sincere prayer
  • → genuine intentions
  • → present-focus
  • → extended humor
  • → careful integrity
  • → constant work to discover and release all forms of bias in oneself
  • → dogged effort to pursue awareness, divine guidance and understanding
Leads a person to "interactive insight from the inside."

Consciously I want to evolve.
My ego resists strenuously.
I surreally "forget" so much!
So I blog for myself, mostly:
to re-read and remember.

People ask me where to begin with the complexity of the stuff on my blog. But my imaginal and related work spans 25 years as of 2016. So the real answer is "I don't know." I can't put all that in a sound bite. And one would have to understand, not just intellectually but experientially, a lot of it from start to middle to begin to understand where I am now. It is 'active imagination' work, resting on an extremely 'open' definition of archetype and energy, mapped at times to various occult patterns because they seem useful and otherwise just loosely personal; but that's not all. Short of how the blog speaks for itself that's about all I can say about it. It's a path I've built myself, for one. ~ Palyne

In the human spirit, as in the universe, nothing is higher or lower; everything has equal rights to a common center which manifests its hidden existence precisely through this harmonic relationship between every part and itself.
-- Goethe

Angels transcend every religion, every philosophy, every creed. In fact angels have no religion as we know it... their existence precedes every religious system that has ever existed on earth.
-- St. Thomas Aquinas

Recent Posts & Archives

  • 2018 (6)
  • 2017 (15)
  • 2016 (25)
  • 2015 (28)
  • 2014 (50)
  • 2013 (79)
  • 2012 (108)
  • 2011 (44)
  • 2010 (117)
  • 2009 (97)
  • 2008 (57)
  • 2007 (11)
  • 2005 (1)

In the beginning all was indivisible. And in becoming manifest, it became, seemingly, divisible. But the divisions must evolve to recognize themselves, and each other, and to then accept themselves, to truly know themselves by knowing each other. To begin, they are blended, confused; it is chaos, it is legion. They are all on the journey to indivisibility, to singularity, to the I AM. The point, of course, is not the destination, but the journey.

-- insight during the Princess of Disks meditation

Spiritual growth is like all other types: you absorb seemingly 'other' energy, and it becomes part of your own sense of identity. The growth is in awareness, and with that comes power which is always over Self.
Diversity is Legion;
Singularity is the I AM.
None of this is new although my approach to it is my own. -- Palyne

Inner Guide is Angelic. She is free of anything akin to doctrine. I call her an Angel because that is the only word I have for it, and because I know, all the way through me, that this is our word for her fundamentally divine nature. Aside from that, I don’t even know what she IS exactly, or what it means, or where it would fit into any model. She is life sized, soul wide, colors and gems and flowers and songs, everything beautiful that ever was, condensed into an identity I am completely in love with–except she feels like part of me too, so it’s like also being in love with yourself, and also with God, and also with the whole universe, both every tiny thing in your mundania, and ‘awareness’ as something so utterly, mind-bogglingly amazing — how could this exist? How could this not exist? How could I ever understand such a thing? — I am left only with joy, with awe.
-- on Inner Guide #4, aka 'Sedaena'. The first IG I had genuine conversation (and reading) with; the first real sign of my HGA.

He is so much inside and outside me, larger than me and yet the light of the tiniest particles of me, I don’t even have a word for whatever it is that he IS. I call him angelic and inner guide and the name he gave me because I have no idea what else to call this. It’s a Being and a Thing and an Event and a Place and a Relationship and… it’s like there is no label that is remotely big enough to encompass whatever it IS.
-- on Inner Guide #5, aka 'Mark.'

The boundary between the imaginational and imaginal is rather fuzzy and it is a developed skill and art to learn to stay there; to maintain your own autonomy while allowing the-others’ autonomy; to be shocked, astounded, grossed out, effused, and other surprise emotions from the interaction; all this without getting lost in the experience like a dream, yet also without pulling back to controlling the experience like a daydream. The former is being swept away by the river, and the latter is standing on the shore thinking about it; learning to walk the fine line of control and allowance to stay in that ‘imaginal realm’ actually takes practice. Crazy people think it’s all autonomous and happening ‘to’ them; people unable to allow this for themselves, may think it’s all imagination; and they’d both be right, because they are both lost; the goal is a whole world that bridges and encompasses both of those.

-- on "Interworlds Meditation"

Q: Where are you now?

Me: Well, back in my own reality.

Q: Wrong. You are in a reality version that distraction and denial have made for you.

Me: How do I get out?

Q: Wrong question. There is no space, there is no time. Where are you again?

Me: Oh. I’m wherever I "pay attention" to being.

Q: Right. You PAY attention. It is the currency of your soul. You rent your reality. Never forget that. The choice to move is yours.

Dealing with the unconscious has become a question of life for us.
The play of the imagination is incalculable.
~ Carl Jung

The imaginary can be innocuous, the imaginal never can.
~ Henry Corbin

A calling may be postponed, avoided, intermittently missed. It may also possess you completely. Whatever; eventually it will out. It makes its claim. The daimon does not go away.
~ James Hillman

There comes a time when the mind takes a higher plane of knowledge but can never prove how it got there.
-- Albert Einstein


This blog documents much of my work in the "inter-worlds" of a greater-self. It's not just esoteric: every thing corresponds — the mundane, the arcane, the divine. If it had to be summed up you might say it is "a universe of personalization." A strange place where monotheism and ultimate-pantheism are one and the same.

I am a natural mystic, if spontaneous experiences determine such a thing. I am not religious in any way; only guidance from the inside drives me. No identities or models unless they are introduced to me from the inside. (Sometimes I use them simply for interest, or because their models are convenient doorways -- but I accept none of their doctrines.) I briefly studied theology at one point, independently (I consider constant prayer a valid part of edu too), and where it led me was "anywhere-else." It's fine for others of course. I consider the heart of free will to be that everyone has their own road. Or as Heinlein once wrote, the right to go to hell in their own handbasket.

This tends to make me obsessed with the divine yet not religious at all, in any form, which is often confusing to onlookers. I am ever in love with and in closer pursuit of integration with The Christ (which I consider a solar-planetary deity, exceeding and preceding all possible religion, though cyclically present within our species) but I'm not remotely a modern Christian, and this also tends to be very confusing to onlookers. I'm a student of archetypes and pattern systems, yet not a jungian intellectual - armchair philosophy bores me - nor a power occultist - which has its own issues (and uniforms) to say the least.

After nearly two decades of certain experiences I felt alone with and thought were unique to me, it turns out I find some harmony in the gnostic writings. I didn't get it from there, and am not fond of that doctrine and the paradigms it came in with, so I ignore it. Which means despite talking about just a few things specific to it (by unknowing accident until a few years ago), I'm not part of that model either.

The road I walk is my own. It doesn't really have an easy label or anybody else on it, that I can see. This is between me and God, so it doesn't really need to work for anybody else. I used to wish I wasn't the only person with such experiences or practices, and started a blog in part in the hope I might find others with something similar. Maybe a need for community. I'm over that now, at least I think. I walk alone, but Light is with me. Can't ask for more than that.

-- Palyne

When we understand that perception is as much about source as target; that energy is a spectrum and best psi perception comes from the center, its balance and blend; that the manifest communication of our Selves is the literal 'reality' we experience; that everything in that reality is a profound 3D language element; that insight with the ‘center’ of spectrum is likely to be via the language-symbols of 'reality;' that these need to be interpreted at the level they are received; this is the path for intentional psi.
-- Insight on the Art of RV

Archmed: Resistance to Evolution

Cubic Mineral Example: Pyrite.

I was looking at a lovely castle in a landscape. Outside the castle walls and some into the distance was a considerable Army, currently at camp not battle. I sensed there was someone in the castle resisting and the people outside were doing more of the starve-them-out-patiently than attack strategy.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Archmed: Resistance to Evolution

The Glory we are Borne of

And I talked to Sun, as Ra sometimes, and I slid into a state of mind local to the mood, I suppose. I loved Sun. And I loved Earth. And I recognized myself as smaller than an atomic particle comparatively and yet, borne of them, and I loved me, for being that wondrous, miraculous creature of them.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Glory we are Borne of

Emotional Armor

After a whole day (and at least 50 arguments) had passed, it was horribly obvious that no matter how simple and silly this sounded, it was clearly infringing on some problem energy I’ve got. As I tried to make another excuse for it, Sun sort of “leaned into my attention” and pointed out the obvious to me: if it were nothing, if it were easy, I’d already have done it. Anything with that amount of verging-on-hysterical-avoidance is an issue.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Emotional Armor


A line or wire was stretched from side to side, about 20 feet up, and a young boy about 12 or so was hung up on it, as if it went through the sleeves of his clothing and behind his shoulders, so his arms were outstretched in a slightly messianic pose. He was silent, as if he had been there a long time. I went up there to him, and before getting him down, I felt as if I should do something… healing, in some way. Before my conscious brain made the decision (a lot of that going on lately), I had put my hand upon his chest and heard myself saying, “Perhaps our Themelians can commune a little.” It felt right, and rushing shook my body with warm shivers down to my knees.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Warehousing

It Begins.

I turned to the window. I was just beginning to get slightly agog over there being so much detail out there, that my inability to see it clearly didn’t seem like lack of visual but rather like of ability to grasp it all. I pointedly noticed some kind of ship moving across a waterway leaving a wake, and then, sofa to my left, out of my peripheral vision I saw a woman with long black hair sitting in the middle of the sofa. My brain and gut realized it was IG (Inner Guide IV) at the same moment, and I literally did a triple-take in astonishment. I mean literally, my physical head bounced back and forth, it was kinda funny. I realized that even “in my head” I had my jaw hanging open in amazement.

I can — WOW I can almost SEE you!! I nearly squealed, trying to maintain some composure and get a hold of myself, while “looking” (sensing and… whatever these things are!) hungrily at what I could perceive of her. I didn’t really get her face clearly, a fuzzy impression is all. I got most the rest of her though. (I did see her face in a couple intense meds we did long ago.) I sat next to her, turned to her at my left, and just tried to take in as much as I could of her, trying to perceive her as clearly as possible.

But — but IG, I haven’t even been able to feel you or hear you or anything for so long! I whined, and now you’re just –you’re just HERE, like — like oh my god, you’re just here! Just like that! That’s so amazing!

I ‘felt’ inside me the response from the aeonic: you did sense her, no matter your conscious denial. If you truly could not sense her at all you would have been bereft beyond imagining. I’ll take their word on it. They’re probably right.

Occasionally through all this I would sob a bit and tell IG how much I missed her and thank you thank you.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at It Begins.

Tarot Prince of Wands, Take 2

Thoth Tarot Prince of Wands

I felt as if I had something on my upper chest, in the area where The Four connect with me, between the heart and throat chakras. … I was affectionate during it, and talking with him, as I had before I’d left the previous med. I had an idea that making this tantric would be a good end but alas, I was neither in the mood nor the situation for that. I merged with him and then with the landscape and I got some decent rushing from that. But I actually got the most rushing while I was working on his legs, especially when I was focusing-in “with emotional impelling” to the degree I could summon. The more you really want the healing and the merge the better it goes at that moment, generally. IG seemed to think it went ok.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Tarot Prince of Wands, Take 2

Tarot Nine 9 of Disks (Gain)

Thoth Tarot Nine of Disks (Gain)

You’ve had my energy ‘open’ as you call it, for a long time, he told me. We’ve worked through a good deal. I realize he’s right. I began to meditate on this more than once and didn’t. It throws me, that you’re just a guy, I say. I’m getting to understand that tarot are each a truly massive, amazing quantity of energy and perspective. To see you as the archetype just a young man in blue jeans is kind of brain crunching.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Tarot Nine 9 of Disks (Gain)

Aeon Round, 01-Sep-2010

Today was my mother’s birthday. She died when she was 37, when I was 9, and most years I try to do something specific on this day. If nothing else, just spend a decent chunk of time thinking about my life. About who I want to be. About what she might have wanted for me. About the advice that she might give me, from wherever she is. Sometimes I try to do something courageous on September 1st. I feel like she would want me to be courageous. I don’t remember a great deal of her, but I do remember that she was often telling me to ask for what I wanted in life. “The worst they can do is say no,” she used to say. I have always had a difficult time asking for anything, or accepting anything. I have gotten better at the latter, I think.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Aeon Round, 01-Sep-2010

Tarot Ace of Disks

Thoth Tarot Ace of Disks

“I don’t think I’ve ever had an arch that was a little girl,” I told her. “The energy is young in you,” she says solemnly.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Tarot Ace of Disks

Tarot The Sun

Thoth Tarot Trumps XIX The Sun

But she doesn’t “do” anything that I notice, I just see this man walking toward me, and I turn to him and realize we’re in a spring meadow of little wildflowers with nothing but meadow as far as I can see in every direction.

It’s the Sun. I know him. I used to meditate with him a lot back in the day, back when I really had some major reality-shifts going. The Sun can be in any form, of course, and any gender, but my favorite was this tall man with golden hair and a big smile.

He always seemed very wise to me, and very calm yet always amused in the most positive way of permanent good-humor. “It’s you!” I say to him, and I throw my arms around him and hold onto him for awhile, before stepping back to look up at him.

“Are you the same via Tarot as via internal ‘planet’ work?” I asked, surveying him critically, looking for differences.

“Mostly, but not entirely,” he says.

“I missed you so much!” I gush at him, and throw my arms around him again.

I feel like crying suddenly. Not in a bad way, but in the way where, when something really good happens, or ‘moves’ you, suddenly all that repressed dark stuff under the surface wants to vent out of the new opening.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Tarot The Sun

Legs and Steel

The really cool thing is that when I turned around to look at the archetype, it was astonishing. Although I couldn’t see detail shape to make out form beyond “person-like”, there was the most amazing array of beautiful, vivid shiny colors. Every color of the rainbow but particularly the blue-green-red shades. It was like that super shiny metallic fabric they make, in motion with light shining off it, but here and there in the midst of the changing glittering hue I would get a glimpse of eyes, like a woman’s eyes, slanted and themselves a bit wild, like some kind of earth fairy or bizarre oversized textile-metallic butterfly. I’ve never seen anything like it, and never saw anything like that in an archetype before.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Legs and Steel