I have found that:
  • → sincere prayer
  • → genuine intentions
  • → present-focus
  • → extended humor
  • → careful integrity
  • → constant work to discover and release all forms of bias in oneself
  • → dogged effort to pursue awareness, divine guidance and understanding
Leads a person to "interactive insight from the inside."

Consciously I want to evolve.
My ego resists strenuously.
I surreally "forget" so much!
So I blog for myself, mostly:
to re-read and remember.

People ask me where to begin with the complexity of the stuff on my blog. But my imaginal and related work spans 25 years as of 2016. So the real answer is "I don't know." I can't put all that in a sound bite. And one would have to understand, not just intellectually but experientially, a lot of it from start to middle to begin to understand where I am now. It is 'active imagination' work, resting on an extremely 'open' definition of archetype and energy, mapped at times to various occult patterns because they seem useful and otherwise just loosely personal; but that's not all. Short of how the blog speaks for itself that's about all I can say about it. It's a path I've built myself, for one. ~ Palyne

In the human spirit, as in the universe, nothing is higher or lower; everything has equal rights to a common center which manifests its hidden existence precisely through this harmonic relationship between every part and itself.
-- Goethe

Angels transcend every religion, every philosophy, every creed. In fact angels have no religion as we know it... their existence precedes every religious system that has ever existed on earth.
-- St. Thomas Aquinas

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In the beginning all was indivisible. And in becoming manifest, it became, seemingly, divisible. But the divisions must evolve to recognize themselves, and each other, and to then accept themselves, to truly know themselves by knowing each other. To begin, they are blended, confused; it is chaos, it is legion. They are all on the journey to indivisibility, to singularity, to the I AM. The point, of course, is not the destination, but the journey.

-- insight during the Princess of Disks meditation

Spiritual growth is like all other types: you absorb seemingly 'other' energy, and it becomes part of your own sense of identity. The growth is in awareness, and with that comes power which is always over Self.
Diversity is Legion;
Singularity is the I AM.
None of this is new although my approach to it is my own. -- Palyne

Inner Guide is Angelic. She is free of anything akin to doctrine. I call her an Angel because that is the only word I have for it, and because I know, all the way through me, that this is our word for her fundamentally divine nature. Aside from that, I don’t even know what she IS exactly, or what it means, or where it would fit into any model. She is life sized, soul wide, colors and gems and flowers and songs, everything beautiful that ever was, condensed into an identity I am completely in love with–except she feels like part of me too, so it’s like also being in love with yourself, and also with God, and also with the whole universe, both every tiny thing in your mundania, and ‘awareness’ as something so utterly, mind-bogglingly amazing — how could this exist? How could this not exist? How could I ever understand such a thing? — I am left only with joy, with awe.
-- on Inner Guide #4, aka 'Sedaena'. The first IG I had genuine conversation (and reading) with; the first real sign of my HGA.

He is so much inside and outside me, larger than me and yet the light of the tiniest particles of me, I don’t even have a word for whatever it is that he IS. I call him angelic and inner guide and the name he gave me because I have no idea what else to call this. It’s a Being and a Thing and an Event and a Place and a Relationship and… it’s like there is no label that is remotely big enough to encompass whatever it IS.
-- on Inner Guide #5, aka 'Mark.'

The boundary between the imaginational and imaginal is rather fuzzy and it is a developed skill and art to learn to stay there; to maintain your own autonomy while allowing the-others’ autonomy; to be shocked, astounded, grossed out, effused, and other surprise emotions from the interaction; all this without getting lost in the experience like a dream, yet also without pulling back to controlling the experience like a daydream. The former is being swept away by the river, and the latter is standing on the shore thinking about it; learning to walk the fine line of control and allowance to stay in that ‘imaginal realm’ actually takes practice. Crazy people think it’s all autonomous and happening ‘to’ them; people unable to allow this for themselves, may think it’s all imagination; and they’d both be right, because they are both lost; the goal is a whole world that bridges and encompasses both of those.

-- on "Interworlds Meditation"

Q: Where are you now?

Me: Well, back in my own reality.

Q: Wrong. You are in a reality version that distraction and denial have made for you.

Me: How do I get out?

Q: Wrong question. There is no space, there is no time. Where are you again?

Me: Oh. I’m wherever I "pay attention" to being.

Q: Right. You PAY attention. It is the currency of your soul. You rent your reality. Never forget that. The choice to move is yours.

Dealing with the unconscious has become a question of life for us.
The play of the imagination is incalculable.
~ Carl Jung

The imaginary can be innocuous, the imaginal never can.
~ Henry Corbin

A calling may be postponed, avoided, intermittently missed. It may also possess you completely. Whatever; eventually it will out. It makes its claim. The daimon does not go away.
~ James Hillman

There comes a time when the mind takes a higher plane of knowledge but can never prove how it got there.
-- Albert Einstein


This blog documents much of my work in the "inter-worlds" of a greater-self. It's not just esoteric: every thing corresponds — the mundane, the arcane, the divine. If it had to be summed up you might say it is "a universe of personalization." A strange place where monotheism and ultimate-pantheism are one and the same.

I am a natural mystic, if spontaneous experiences determine such a thing. I am not religious in any way; only guidance from the inside drives me. No identities or models unless they are introduced to me from the inside. (Sometimes I use them simply for interest, or because their models are convenient doorways -- but I accept none of their doctrines.) I briefly studied theology at one point, independently (I consider constant prayer a valid part of edu too), and where it led me was "anywhere-else." It's fine for others of course. I consider the heart of free will to be that everyone has their own road. Or as Heinlein once wrote, the right to go to hell in their own handbasket.

This tends to make me obsessed with the divine yet not religious at all, in any form, which is often confusing to onlookers. I am ever in love with and in closer pursuit of integration with The Christ (which I consider a solar-planetary deity, exceeding and preceding all possible religion, though cyclically present within our species) but I'm not remotely a modern Christian, and this also tends to be very confusing to onlookers. I'm a student of archetypes and pattern systems, yet not a jungian intellectual - armchair philosophy bores me - nor a power occultist - which has its own issues (and uniforms) to say the least.

After nearly two decades of certain experiences I felt alone with and thought were unique to me, it turns out I find some harmony in the gnostic writings. I didn't get it from there, and am not fond of that doctrine and the paradigms it came in with, so I ignore it. Which means despite talking about just a few things specific to it (by unknowing accident until a few years ago), I'm not part of that model either.

The road I walk is my own. It doesn't really have an easy label or anybody else on it, that I can see. This is between me and God, so it doesn't really need to work for anybody else. I used to wish I wasn't the only person with such experiences or practices, and started a blog in part in the hope I might find others with something similar. Maybe a need for community. I'm over that now, at least I think. I walk alone, but Light is with me. Can't ask for more than that.

-- Palyne

When we understand that perception is as much about source as target; that energy is a spectrum and best psi perception comes from the center, its balance and blend; that the manifest communication of our Selves is the literal 'reality' we experience; that everything in that reality is a profound 3D language element; that insight with the ‘center’ of spectrum is likely to be via the language-symbols of 'reality;' that these need to be interpreted at the level they are received; this is the path for intentional psi.
-- Insight on the Art of RV

Nothing New Apparently

I suddenly ‘saw’ this totally black skull, but black like very shiny like lacquered, it was a couple feet below my ‘eye level’ in the vision about a foot from my body, and it was looking slightly downward.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Nothing New Apparently

More from Crown Chakra – the three layers detail

Alright so the last time I was talking with crown it showed me that there were three “layers” between this part that goes ‘through’ the top of the head (the part shaped like a giant garlic bulb, with a stem that goes down to the top of the heart chakra), and the part up high that ‘fountains’ out. The layers were ‘restoration’, ‘conversion,’ and then ‘amplification.’ Today it showed me some detail on those.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at More from Crown Chakra – the three layers detail

Crown, Dream and Mark

A few days ago, late at night, I was in a ‘meditative state’ having been talking to Mark, and the crown chakra showed me something.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Crown, Dream and Mark

Crown Chakra Review

My crown chakra once had an experiential-conversation with me and showed me some detail about its nature. Since that time I have had various insights. I’ve decided to write down what I feel is my greater understanding of it, now that it’s had more time to assimilate in me and be improved by further experience.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Crown Chakra Review

Notes to Self, 29-Mar-2012

So me and Ith are doing this and I end up imagining ‘all the blocks we have’ in a circle around us, that went above our heads and below our feet and up the sides. Although I was completely oblivious consciously to this color at the time, I realized later, and even still I feel it, that the big perfect circle shape was a medium-blue (and I feel that I felt it then, just wasn’t paying attention). … When people marry with fierce attraction and later have none, might it be that they ‘successfully integrated’? So the chemistry between them is gone? They might as well be siblings then. … Lately I have to almost be careful what I think about. In my head is quiet “intuition conversation” about anything, as well as everything from ‘shapes’ that translate to meaning to actual visuals and concepts. … I’ve just reinvented some a combination of the celtic circle cross, the masonic/occult rose cross, and the native american zia (‘four-rayed sun’). …

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Notes to Self, 29-Mar-2012

The Landscape of Me

This was still going on when I realized I was distracted by this visual out the window. Out in the distance, in the dark, was this absolutely amazing green pyramid. […] There was a shorter, maybe 4 foot wall that was about 20 feet out from the stone border (so, a fat walkway/path around it). … I had to step out and walk around a man sitting against the wall at one point. He was old, and obviously blind, and his head followed me; he clearly saw me. I thought, now that is the archetype for sure: you are invisible in a virtual world and only the blind man can see you.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Landscape of Me

It Begins.

I turned to the window. I was just beginning to get slightly agog over there being so much detail out there, that my inability to see it clearly didn’t seem like lack of visual but rather like of ability to grasp it all. I pointedly noticed some kind of ship moving across a waterway leaving a wake, and then, sofa to my left, out of my peripheral vision I saw a woman with long black hair sitting in the middle of the sofa. My brain and gut realized it was IG (Inner Guide IV) at the same moment, and I literally did a triple-take in astonishment. I mean literally, my physical head bounced back and forth, it was kinda funny. I realized that even “in my head” I had my jaw hanging open in amazement.

I can — WOW I can almost SEE you!! I nearly squealed, trying to maintain some composure and get a hold of myself, while “looking” (sensing and… whatever these things are!) hungrily at what I could perceive of her. I didn’t really get her face clearly, a fuzzy impression is all. I got most the rest of her though. (I did see her face in a couple intense meds we did long ago.) I sat next to her, turned to her at my left, and just tried to take in as much as I could of her, trying to perceive her as clearly as possible.

But — but IG, I haven’t even been able to feel you or hear you or anything for so long! I whined, and now you’re just –you’re just HERE, like — like oh my god, you’re just here! Just like that! That’s so amazing!

I ‘felt’ inside me the response from the aeonic: you did sense her, no matter your conscious denial. If you truly could not sense her at all you would have been bereft beyond imagining. I’ll take their word on it. They’re probably right.

Occasionally through all this I would sob a bit and tell IG how much I missed her and thank you thank you.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at It Begins.

Tarot Princess of Disks, Take 1

Thoth Tarot Princess of Disks

I walked around the side of her studying her, wondering if perhaps her being some earth-of-earth symbol might make me already integrated with her and so maybe there wasn’t really anything that needed doing to work with the energy, maybe it was already ok with me. “You seem like you’re ok,” I said to her as I continued around the side and into the alcove itself. “You –” And then I saw it. Why she was so still. Out of the ground of the plateau in the alcove had grown these thick heavy vines that were instead made of black iron. They had grown up and literally into her. She was chained to the ground, to the chair.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Tarot Princess of Disks, Take 1

Hangin’ with Bolehren

I was going to do the 9 of Disks and asked her what we should do about that. Should I un-merge? What if she didn’t have the degree of… absorption I did or something, would that limit the result? What if it was something she wasn’t ready for? What if…? She felt that I should consider this much like I consider the healing question. IF someone is ‘with me’ at the time I am to do a certain energy work, then just assume that is how it is to be, for both sides, and c’est la vie.

So we were doing the meditation together. Before IG had given us anything, I started giggling. I swear it felt like we were kids in a sleepover trying to be still and quiet because it’s bedtime, and stifling giggles so mom doesn’t get annoyed.

As we worked through the stuff from IG, I kept having all these bizarre spontaneous memories. Stuff I have not thought of probably since the time they happened, really really old stuff. Like what someone said to me one day when I was 18, or a situation from many years ago. Now, although I do get anything from energy via memory to occasional wandering, this was different.

After about the 8th thing, I realized that in a weird way they all had a certain thing in common. A genre, you might say. They all related to my relationship with another person(s). Most were things I didn’t feel had gone well in some fashion. I realized that as this is what Bolehren’s energy relates to, at least in part as I was previously told, that this was like her being ‘sparked’ by the work we were doing, as opposed to me. Well, yes it is me, but you might say, the sector of me that overlaps with and/or is composed of her.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Hangin’ with Bolehren

Noisy Humans

I’m really enjoying sleeping lately, since I nearly always seem to dream answers to any question or idea I had before sleeping, and at least half-remember it on awakening.

After falling asleep again this morning (after blogging my crown-chakra dream and then talking to my friend by phone), I had two dreams I remembered on awakening.

The first one addressed a conversation we had about heart vs. crown chakra although it also had, I think maybe 2nd chakra involved. Unfortunately I do not remember that dream. I only remember thinking that he had been correct regarding the “equal divinity of all.” He was saying how many people consider the crown chakra “more spiritual” or in some way better than others. But anybody who’s met Jesus, definitely king of the christ-consciousness heart chakra, knows that one is just as divine, though different.

We’d talked about how the crown chakra brought a sort of intelligent-insight-understanding, like all is as it should be, without any ‘attachment’ to the world. But how on its own, it sort of removes the passion. Having the other chakras open to balance that, is important.

Anyway. We’d also talked about how different kinds of intelligence might have different perception… a little about my perceiving on two occasions a spider.

In the second dream, I think I may have “absorbed some perspective.” Heh.

I was in some other world, moving along some path in the outdoors, with a fence and field to my left and something like a bunch

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Noisy Humans

The Fountain of Crown

Lately every time I wake up it’s with the understanding that one of my chakras is ‘talking to me’. I know, funny huh. It’s just that I usually can’t hold on to whatever it was, which is so exasperating.

As for which might have been the one talking to me, generally I have no idea. I don’t know how I can say I even knew that much to begin with, as there isn’t really any “feel” associated with them. I mean much like the Consortium — on the “seamless” moments as they might call it — there is simply no feel of “other” for me to “recognize”. It’s not that I “feel” a chakra was talking to me. I simply know it, in an understanding, like something so obvious there is no questioning of this. Which is good or I would probably be questioning it…

This morning I know I was talking to the crown chakra because I remember a small fraction — just a tiny percentage — of what was accompanying the words. I wish I remembered more, but maybe if I really focus on writing down the pieces I can hold, the “focus” will increase and I will get to keep more of this stuff in the future. Actually I have the feeling if I just start with what I have I will pull in more, so here goes:

The crown doesn’t start at the crown. Actually I knew this from a previous few moments of ‘feel’ and

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Fountain of Crown

Rambling 14Dec09

Thoughts/questions/experiences sparked by recent materials I found and a couple exercises.


What is really the difference between the archetype of an energy and the energy? I know officially it is ‘my relationship’ with that thing; not that-thing-itself. But how could I perceive it without my relationship in the way anyway?

Is it impossible to truly perceive any thing as it truly is?

The-thing-itself, I suspect, would always be a geometry. Does that mean that everything manifest that doesn’t come across like an 11-D geometric shape is, actually, an ‘archetype’? A symbol or translation?

So we are walking around an entire landscape of “symbols not things”? Skyscrapers and flowers and cats and cars… no different than if they were green cubes and yellow tetrahedrons that chirped?

Is it that we acclimatize to the symbols and so we hard-wire the neural perception like a shortcut to meaning, and we start thinking that every thing IS instead the symbol?

Do the QBL (Kabbalah) “correspondences” have validity because everything we perceive is not a ‘thing’ but ‘an archetype/symbol’? So it’s not that there are things, and then symbolic meaning; it’s that everything is symbolic meaning.

It’s not that we have a viewing target of the Eiffel Tower and get symbolic data; it’s that the target itself IS symbolic, because everything is. There is no such thing as literal data only matching-symbols. Hmmn. That might give a different idea regarding RV data if I think about it enough.

Does a

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Rambling 14Dec09