I have found that:
  • → sincere prayer
  • → genuine intentions
  • → present-focus
  • → extended humor
  • → careful integrity
  • → constant work to discover and release all forms of bias in oneself
  • → dogged effort to pursue awareness, divine guidance and understanding
Leads a person to "interactive insight from the inside."

Consciously I want to evolve.
My ego resists strenuously.
I surreally "forget" so much!
So I blog for myself, mostly:
to re-read and remember.

People ask me where to begin with the complexity of the stuff on my blog. But my imaginal and related work spans 25 years as of 2016. So the real answer is "I don't know." I can't put all that in a sound bite. And one would have to understand, not just intellectually but experientially, a lot of it from start to middle to begin to understand where I am now. It is 'active imagination' work, resting on an extremely 'open' definition of archetype and energy, mapped at times to various occult patterns because they seem useful and otherwise just loosely personal; but that's not all. Short of how the blog speaks for itself that's about all I can say about it. It's a path I've built myself, for one. ~ Palyne

In the human spirit, as in the universe, nothing is higher or lower; everything has equal rights to a common center which manifests its hidden existence precisely through this harmonic relationship between every part and itself.
-- Goethe

Angels transcend every religion, every philosophy, every creed. In fact angels have no religion as we know it... their existence precedes every religious system that has ever existed on earth.
-- St. Thomas Aquinas

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In the beginning all was indivisible. And in becoming manifest, it became, seemingly, divisible. But the divisions must evolve to recognize themselves, and each other, and to then accept themselves, to truly know themselves by knowing each other. To begin, they are blended, confused; it is chaos, it is legion. They are all on the journey to indivisibility, to singularity, to the I AM. The point, of course, is not the destination, but the journey.

-- insight during the Princess of Disks meditation

Spiritual growth is like all other types: you absorb seemingly 'other' energy, and it becomes part of your own sense of identity. The growth is in awareness, and with that comes power which is always over Self.
Diversity is Legion;
Singularity is the I AM.
None of this is new although my approach to it is my own. -- Palyne

Inner Guide is Angelic. She is free of anything akin to doctrine. I call her an Angel because that is the only word I have for it, and because I know, all the way through me, that this is our word for her fundamentally divine nature. Aside from that, I don’t even know what she IS exactly, or what it means, or where it would fit into any model. She is life sized, soul wide, colors and gems and flowers and songs, everything beautiful that ever was, condensed into an identity I am completely in love with–except she feels like part of me too, so it’s like also being in love with yourself, and also with God, and also with the whole universe, both every tiny thing in your mundania, and ‘awareness’ as something so utterly, mind-bogglingly amazing — how could this exist? How could this not exist? How could I ever understand such a thing? — I am left only with joy, with awe.
-- on Inner Guide #4, aka 'Sedaena'. The first IG I had genuine conversation (and reading) with; the first real sign of my HGA.

He is so much inside and outside me, larger than me and yet the light of the tiniest particles of me, I don’t even have a word for whatever it is that he IS. I call him angelic and inner guide and the name he gave me because I have no idea what else to call this. It’s a Being and a Thing and an Event and a Place and a Relationship and… it’s like there is no label that is remotely big enough to encompass whatever it IS.
-- on Inner Guide #5, aka 'Mark.'

The boundary between the imaginational and imaginal is rather fuzzy and it is a developed skill and art to learn to stay there; to maintain your own autonomy while allowing the-others’ autonomy; to be shocked, astounded, grossed out, effused, and other surprise emotions from the interaction; all this without getting lost in the experience like a dream, yet also without pulling back to controlling the experience like a daydream. The former is being swept away by the river, and the latter is standing on the shore thinking about it; learning to walk the fine line of control and allowance to stay in that ‘imaginal realm’ actually takes practice. Crazy people think it’s all autonomous and happening ‘to’ them; people unable to allow this for themselves, may think it’s all imagination; and they’d both be right, because they are both lost; the goal is a whole world that bridges and encompasses both of those.

-- on "Interworlds Meditation"

Q: Where are you now?

Me: Well, back in my own reality.

Q: Wrong. You are in a reality version that distraction and denial have made for you.

Me: How do I get out?

Q: Wrong question. There is no space, there is no time. Where are you again?

Me: Oh. I’m wherever I "pay attention" to being.

Q: Right. You PAY attention. It is the currency of your soul. You rent your reality. Never forget that. The choice to move is yours.

Dealing with the unconscious has become a question of life for us.
The play of the imagination is incalculable.
~ Carl Jung

The imaginary can be innocuous, the imaginal never can.
~ Henry Corbin

A calling may be postponed, avoided, intermittently missed. It may also possess you completely. Whatever; eventually it will out. It makes its claim. The daimon does not go away.
~ James Hillman

There comes a time when the mind takes a higher plane of knowledge but can never prove how it got there.
-- Albert Einstein


This blog documents much of my work in the "inter-worlds" of a greater-self. It's not just esoteric: every thing corresponds — the mundane, the arcane, the divine. If it had to be summed up you might say it is "a universe of personalization." A strange place where monotheism and ultimate-pantheism are one and the same.

I am a natural mystic, if spontaneous experiences determine such a thing. I am not religious in any way; only guidance from the inside drives me. No identities or models unless they are introduced to me from the inside. (Sometimes I use them simply for interest, or because their models are convenient doorways -- but I accept none of their doctrines.) I briefly studied theology at one point, independently (I consider constant prayer a valid part of edu too), and where it led me was "anywhere-else." It's fine for others of course. I consider the heart of free will to be that everyone has their own road. Or as Heinlein once wrote, the right to go to hell in their own handbasket.

This tends to make me obsessed with the divine yet not religious at all, in any form, which is often confusing to onlookers. I am ever in love with and in closer pursuit of integration with The Christ (which I consider a solar-planetary deity, exceeding and preceding all possible religion, though cyclically present within our species) but I'm not remotely a modern Christian, and this also tends to be very confusing to onlookers. I'm a student of archetypes and pattern systems, yet not a jungian intellectual - armchair philosophy bores me - nor a power occultist - which has its own issues (and uniforms) to say the least.

After nearly two decades of certain experiences I felt alone with and thought were unique to me, it turns out I find some harmony in the gnostic writings. I didn't get it from there, and am not fond of that doctrine and the paradigms it came in with, so I ignore it. Which means despite talking about just a few things specific to it (by unknowing accident until a few years ago), I'm not part of that model either.

The road I walk is my own. It doesn't really have an easy label or anybody else on it, that I can see. This is between me and God, so it doesn't really need to work for anybody else. I used to wish I wasn't the only person with such experiences or practices, and started a blog in part in the hope I might find others with something similar. Maybe a need for community. I'm over that now, at least I think. I walk alone, but Light is with me. Can't ask for more than that.

-- Palyne

When we understand that perception is as much about source as target; that energy is a spectrum and best psi perception comes from the center, its balance and blend; that the manifest communication of our Selves is the literal 'reality' we experience; that everything in that reality is a profound 3D language element; that insight with the ‘center’ of spectrum is likely to be via the language-symbols of 'reality;' that these need to be interpreted at the level they are received; this is the path for intentional psi.
-- Insight on the Art of RV

Tarot Seven 7 of Disks (Failure)

Thoth Tarot Seven of Disks (Failure)

I stood there staring at them while they argued. What is the point of commonality? I wondered. Where is the energy that brings them together? And then I felt that it was this string or cable, it looked like it was made out of the same stuff the ‘light beings who wear [shorter] humans like suits’ seem to be made of, that super smooth, soft but intense white opaque light. It came from “the center above” — maybe the center of the galaxy, like I imagine when I’m doing my grounding before meditations — but I understood that it was same point of divine for all of them.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Tarot Seven 7 of Disks (Failure)

In the Depths

I was in a tiny room of what seemed a high-tech one-man vehicle. The rotors seemed a little old fashioned given the tech inside. A big screen in front of me showed the world straight ahead. Screens above and below that showed me the top and bottom views, and to each side the left and right views, and a larger screen to the far right showed me the view looking behind. There were displays and meters and dials and such all over the place. I sat down in the chair in the middle, and it began to move. I marveled a little at the visuals. I mean, getting count-them-six different screens to show different dynamic visuals at the same time all kinds of other things around me were new and visual, is really quite a complex thing. I noted that on the other hand, I was not able to ‘focus on’ more than a couple of the screens (with their moving landscapes) at a time, but then again, I considered, I probably couldn’t in normal life, either.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at In the Depths

Tarot Six 6 of Disks (Success)

Thoth Tarot Six of Disks (Success)

The minute I saw the back of him I felt ill. It was utter chaos. As if he were wearing this ‘face’ for the world — the whole front of him — that seemed pleasing and harmless. But the back was a nightmare. Sticking out of the back of head and all the way down his body was… everything. Spikes and knives. Mold and weird growths. Black cancerous looking things that made me nauseated. Some bugs. Some chaos. Slime. Reaaaalllly disgusting and horrifying, dangerous and frightening. Usually some symbol that makes me that disgusted requires a Tek med!

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Tarot Six 6 of Disks (Success)

What Makes You Safe

I consider it totally my right. I know some people go on about permission to heal and all that. I think that’s ridiculous. I consider if anything falls in front of me, that energy has chosen to interact with me. And in my opinion “all things long to evolve”. Aside from which, anything in MY attention sphere makes it part of MY reality and, if the symbol suggests problems, I feel it’s literally my duty to fix it, not in a bad ‘should’ way, but in an honored, ‘opportunity for sharing divine energy’ way. If I’m an ER doctor and I find someone bleeding on my doorstep, I’m not going to dick around about whether they’ve signed in triplicate and can talk to me reasonably about it before I help them. So, no. I don’t consider it an invasion of privacy–I believe in psi, in their psi, so as far as I’m concerned, our mere interaction already says they have chosen to invite me–and the “geometry of who they are” is divine; healing them helps them better find it. If they didn’t want to be healed they wouldn’t be in my reality.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at What Makes You Safe

The Spaces Between

I have noticed, over time, that I cyclically have a phase where my eyes keep unfocussing. Where I will realize that a moment ago I was doing something but now I’m neither doing nor thinking, and my eyes are open, but completely unfocused.

After awhile it starts to bother me that I am living my life in trance and I start forcing myself to stop that. I don’t know why it’s more common in certain cycles.

I made an effort to meditate on several occasions yesterday. Somehow the moment I began, there was this whole list of things that seemed impossible to get through without getting mentally lost. The simple cleansing visualization kept doing me in. I never even got to the point of starting the actual meditation part with Inner Guide. I was intending to do Six of Disks (“Success”).

Today I will get to it, let alone through it.


I found this quote from Jung that I feel concurs with what I was saying about astrology in my previous post — that there is clearly a correspondence between the solar system and humans, but that I feel it is a parallel secondary effect — certainly I do not feel the stars are a ’cause’ as seems to be the popular view. Jung wrote, in 1947:

Astrology is of particular interest to the psychologist, since it contains a sort of psychological experience which we call projected–this means that we find the psychological facts as it were in the

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Spaces Between

Astrology, Synchronicity: Thoughts for the Day 26-Aug-2010

It made me think: Maybe cosmology has its own form of saints and saviors. Of “energies which embody” in order that they might “create a new geometry with” all the embodied-energies currently in place.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Astrology, Synchronicity: Thoughts for the Day 26-Aug-2010

Bugs and Ideas That Bug Me

I understand that given it would have taken 20 seconds of intent, refusing to do a prayer to all the other devas too, was an intentional bad-intent and death-action. This from someone who almost never kills anything.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Bugs and Ideas That Bug Me

The Angles of Angels

Speaking of astrology, here’s a way to see how people innately differ. My 14 year old is a sun, moon, rising, and some other planet, all in Leo.

She says, “If you could have any magic talent what would it be?”

I said, “Maybe teleporting.”

She says, “That would be great! I could sneak in and get cool clothes and jewelry and all kinds of stuff. What would YOU do?”

I thought about it and said, “I’d rescue soldiers and hostages who are trapped behind enemy lines.”

She looked at me like I was an alien and said, “Mom, you’re such a humanitarian.”

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Angles of Angels


Miscellany —

I did remember, later this evening, something Nero and I talked about, when I was half asleep.

He’d said I shouldn’t do any archetype meditations tonight because I needed to ‘process’ stuff. He suggested I get more exercise to help work energies through my body better.

And he brought up keeping a better environment around me. As I think the 3rd did later. Unless I am mixing it all up which as I was a little altered in both, is possible.

I was telling my kid this today (about cleaning) and she acted like this was moron-level obvious. I realized she was right and I joked, “Yes, Saturn has a direct effect on me, and but my bedroom doesn’t matter at all.”

I had a minor daydream about a real nice minimalist environ (I can dream) and a nice relaxed ‘routine’ of schedule and incense and some nice music.

That was the one thing I always admired so much about my prior meditation teacher. She got up before the kids and would straighten the house and then take a shower, and light incense and some jar candles and put on some harp music or something, and then sit down in her comfy chair and meditate quietly until everyone else got up. Something similar at night. And during the day, whenever she had time and no demands on her, she might just sit down and meditate, for one minute or ten or 3 hours.

Despite being a single mom

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Overtraining

Freeing Nero

I’ve been asking IG to challenge me and help me let go of resistance and expectations. I’ve been thinking of it like, I want her to do something interesting and unexpected and then I’ll try to “deal with it.” What I suddenly understood was that what IG ‘builds’ for me, so to speak, she builds out of me. Literally, I “compose” it. So she can’t just do something totally outside my ken and then hope I can perceive it or deal with it, because the thing she “does” is built FROM me. And so if I am resisting, expecting, etc., that basically limits her options. So I’ve been putting a lot of this on her, like I want her to push me and I’ll respond, but it kind of needs to happen the other way around — I need to be more open, give her the raw materials to build with, so she CAN push me.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Freeing Nero

The Archetype of Sleep Deprivation

I don’t know how well this is working. Early this morning (or was it last night?) I had this conversation:

Me: Taan? Are you there?

Taan: Yes.

Me: Why do I never see Nero any more?

Taan: Because you choose not to.

I realize “on some level” this is true. I decide it’s ridiculous and unfair and I don’t want it to be true.

Me: That’s not true!

He is silent. I sigh. I suppose I will have to do a meditation on not blocking Nero now for godssakes, do these ever end? I need to like, go live in a cave up a mountain in Tibet to have enough time for all this stuff!

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Archetype of Sleep Deprivation

Lifemeds: Work (Froggy Psychology)

Eventually, I find myself in this super tall chair. Like 3 stories high just a single chair. I’m looking out into the far, far distance and she indicates that there should be something there which… gets my attention. I almost had the feeling like, ‘what’s wrong with this picture?’ So I’m looking for awhile and I catch myself having just thought, “Well there is really nothing unusual there at all, except that little thing leaping into the air repeatedly in the middle trying to get my attention.” Swear to god this is what I realized I had just told myself, after which I had concluded I didn’t see anything at all! If I had a brain I’d be dangerous!

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Lifemeds: Work (Froggy Psychology)