I have found that:
  • → sincere prayer
  • → genuine intentions
  • → present-focus
  • → extended humor
  • → careful integrity
  • → constant work to discover and release all forms of bias in oneself
  • → dogged effort to pursue awareness, divine guidance and understanding
Leads a person to "interactive insight from the inside."

Consciously I want to evolve.
My ego resists strenuously.
I surreally "forget" so much!
So I blog for myself, mostly:
to re-read and remember.

People ask me where to begin with the complexity of the stuff on my blog. But my imaginal and related work spans 25 years as of 2016. So the real answer is "I don't know." I can't put all that in a sound bite. And one would have to understand, not just intellectually but experientially, a lot of it from start to middle to begin to understand where I am now. It is 'active imagination' work, resting on an extremely 'open' definition of archetype and energy, mapped at times to various occult patterns because they seem useful and otherwise just loosely personal; but that's not all. Short of how the blog speaks for itself that's about all I can say about it. It's a path I've built myself, for one. ~ Palyne

In the human spirit, as in the universe, nothing is higher or lower; everything has equal rights to a common center which manifests its hidden existence precisely through this harmonic relationship between every part and itself.
-- Goethe

Angels transcend every religion, every philosophy, every creed. In fact angels have no religion as we know it... their existence precedes every religious system that has ever existed on earth.
-- St. Thomas Aquinas

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In the beginning all was indivisible. And in becoming manifest, it became, seemingly, divisible. But the divisions must evolve to recognize themselves, and each other, and to then accept themselves, to truly know themselves by knowing each other. To begin, they are blended, confused; it is chaos, it is legion. They are all on the journey to indivisibility, to singularity, to the I AM. The point, of course, is not the destination, but the journey.

-- insight during the Princess of Disks meditation

Spiritual growth is like all other types: you absorb seemingly 'other' energy, and it becomes part of your own sense of identity. The growth is in awareness, and with that comes power which is always over Self.
Diversity is Legion;
Singularity is the I AM.
None of this is new although my approach to it is my own. -- Palyne

Inner Guide is Angelic. She is free of anything akin to doctrine. I call her an Angel because that is the only word I have for it, and because I know, all the way through me, that this is our word for her fundamentally divine nature. Aside from that, I don’t even know what she IS exactly, or what it means, or where it would fit into any model. She is life sized, soul wide, colors and gems and flowers and songs, everything beautiful that ever was, condensed into an identity I am completely in love with–except she feels like part of me too, so it’s like also being in love with yourself, and also with God, and also with the whole universe, both every tiny thing in your mundania, and ‘awareness’ as something so utterly, mind-bogglingly amazing — how could this exist? How could this not exist? How could I ever understand such a thing? — I am left only with joy, with awe.
-- on Inner Guide #4, aka 'Sedaena'. The first IG I had genuine conversation (and reading) with; the first real sign of my HGA.

He is so much inside and outside me, larger than me and yet the light of the tiniest particles of me, I don’t even have a word for whatever it is that he IS. I call him angelic and inner guide and the name he gave me because I have no idea what else to call this. It’s a Being and a Thing and an Event and a Place and a Relationship and… it’s like there is no label that is remotely big enough to encompass whatever it IS.
-- on Inner Guide #5, aka 'Mark.'

The boundary between the imaginational and imaginal is rather fuzzy and it is a developed skill and art to learn to stay there; to maintain your own autonomy while allowing the-others’ autonomy; to be shocked, astounded, grossed out, effused, and other surprise emotions from the interaction; all this without getting lost in the experience like a dream, yet also without pulling back to controlling the experience like a daydream. The former is being swept away by the river, and the latter is standing on the shore thinking about it; learning to walk the fine line of control and allowance to stay in that ‘imaginal realm’ actually takes practice. Crazy people think it’s all autonomous and happening ‘to’ them; people unable to allow this for themselves, may think it’s all imagination; and they’d both be right, because they are both lost; the goal is a whole world that bridges and encompasses both of those.

-- on "Interworlds Meditation"

Q: Where are you now?

Me: Well, back in my own reality.

Q: Wrong. You are in a reality version that distraction and denial have made for you.

Me: How do I get out?

Q: Wrong question. There is no space, there is no time. Where are you again?

Me: Oh. I’m wherever I "pay attention" to being.

Q: Right. You PAY attention. It is the currency of your soul. You rent your reality. Never forget that. The choice to move is yours.

Dealing with the unconscious has become a question of life for us.
The play of the imagination is incalculable.
~ Carl Jung

The imaginary can be innocuous, the imaginal never can.
~ Henry Corbin

A calling may be postponed, avoided, intermittently missed. It may also possess you completely. Whatever; eventually it will out. It makes its claim. The daimon does not go away.
~ James Hillman

There comes a time when the mind takes a higher plane of knowledge but can never prove how it got there.
-- Albert Einstein


This blog documents much of my work in the "inter-worlds" of a greater-self. It's not just esoteric: every thing corresponds — the mundane, the arcane, the divine. If it had to be summed up you might say it is "a universe of personalization." A strange place where monotheism and ultimate-pantheism are one and the same.

I am a natural mystic, if spontaneous experiences determine such a thing. I am not religious in any way; only guidance from the inside drives me. No identities or models unless they are introduced to me from the inside. (Sometimes I use them simply for interest, or because their models are convenient doorways -- but I accept none of their doctrines.) I briefly studied theology at one point, independently (I consider constant prayer a valid part of edu too), and where it led me was "anywhere-else." It's fine for others of course. I consider the heart of free will to be that everyone has their own road. Or as Heinlein once wrote, the right to go to hell in their own handbasket.

This tends to make me obsessed with the divine yet not religious at all, in any form, which is often confusing to onlookers. I am ever in love with and in closer pursuit of integration with The Christ (which I consider a solar-planetary deity, exceeding and preceding all possible religion, though cyclically present within our species) but I'm not remotely a modern Christian, and this also tends to be very confusing to onlookers. I'm a student of archetypes and pattern systems, yet not a jungian intellectual - armchair philosophy bores me - nor a power occultist - which has its own issues (and uniforms) to say the least.

After nearly two decades of certain experiences I felt alone with and thought were unique to me, it turns out I find some harmony in the gnostic writings. I didn't get it from there, and am not fond of that doctrine and the paradigms it came in with, so I ignore it. Which means despite talking about just a few things specific to it (by unknowing accident until a few years ago), I'm not part of that model either.

The road I walk is my own. It doesn't really have an easy label or anybody else on it, that I can see. This is between me and God, so it doesn't really need to work for anybody else. I used to wish I wasn't the only person with such experiences or practices, and started a blog in part in the hope I might find others with something similar. Maybe a need for community. I'm over that now, at least I think. I walk alone, but Light is with me. Can't ask for more than that.

-- Palyne

When we understand that perception is as much about source as target; that energy is a spectrum and best psi perception comes from the center, its balance and blend; that the manifest communication of our Selves is the literal 'reality' we experience; that everything in that reality is a profound 3D language element; that insight with the ‘center’ of spectrum is likely to be via the language-symbols of 'reality;' that these need to be interpreted at the level they are received; this is the path for intentional psi.
-- Insight on the Art of RV

Rambling. And: IG is Angelic

I was talking with IG, sort of. Emoting ‘with’ her as I do sometimes. Wondering just a little if I should close my eyes or turn around or something else that might make it easier for her to bring me an archetype, because sometimes I get the impression my expectations limit things. She has been so wildly creative and pushing the boundaries of what I expect or can figure out how to deal with. I was idly thinking about this at the same time I was just working on ‘being with’ her, when all the sudden, I think she shared her perception with me a little.

She thought I was so sweet. I felt her ‘sweetness’ on perceiving me and my efforts. That is another topic I’ll address in a bit.

The main point was that from her perspectives, what I am doing in archetype meditations, is like… I don’t want to say childish because we have a negative baggage on that word and she has nothing negative, she is nothing but love. But it is so… so rudimentary. Actually even that word is way too big and too advanced. If there are 100 points of ‘skill and experience’ I thought myself to be around, oh, maybe 30 or 40. But through her I saw: I am not even to 1! Not even to 0.01. Not because I’m not capable, but because that’s the limits on the experience I have allowed myself.

I suddenly understood that the kind of interaction she and I could have was so huge, wild, creative, amazing, powerful, I can’t even wrap my brain around a fraction of it. I can’t even imagine it, literally.

I saw that my little step by step process, despite that any one of those elements were fine if I wanted to do that or interact that way, the process — moreso, the “expectations” — were an incredible limitation. There aren’t even words for how limiting it is.

I felt as if, she had this entire world, this range that was cosmic, and such wild opportunity, and yet there I am down at the algae/amoeba level, walking through ‘the inner guide meditation’. There’s nothing wrong with it. It’s been awesome for me. I’ve certainly branched out of it a bit. But… it’s a tiny little box. I never knew that. I thought it was a doorway but it turns out it’s more like a tiny little structure.

The expectations limit what we can do.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Rambling. And: IG is Angelic

Archmed: the Stuff I Want

Me: What does this mean? Wearing one’s heart on the sleeve… outside? I’m not sure.

Arch: The inside is so cluttered there is not room for the heart.

Me: Ahhhh. That seems kind of symbolic, about psychological stuff, I guess. OK, let’s work on this.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Archmed: the Stuff I Want

Tarot The Tower, Take 3

Thoth Tarot Trumps XVI The Tower

I have had tremendous resistance about continuing the archetype of tarot “the Tower” meditation. Last night I went to sleep too late to meditate. But before falling asleep, curled up happily in my pillows, I talked to IG. I asked her to please work with me in dreams, and in waking, to “work through the Tower energy” so I would keep moving forward on it. Had I known the dream result ahead of time I might not have asked.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Tarot The Tower, Take 3

Tarot The Tower, Take 2

Thoth Tarot Trumps XVI The Tower

After awhile, it started to get a little demoralizing that this kept happening, but I told myself: it isn’t how many times you fail. It is only important that you make the effort one time more than that happens, so you succeed. So I went back again. And again. I am sure that people way more interesting than me just have really cosmic experiences and don’t have to blog about how they spontaneously spaced out a hundred times during a simple little jungian/shamanic-style meditation. I feel like such a nerd. I still don’t even see what is so HARD about this. I mean I don’t feel the profound emotions I have with many other archetypes. Actually I guess I don’t feel much at all, since even slightly too much mental focus instantly shuts me off like a light switch. At least body is now dumping me out the door back to this world again so I can realize after a moment that something just radically changed, and that I am in the midst of some completely unrelated thought process, and begin again. That certainly helps. In fact I feel as if having worked this out with body has probably saved me months of failed meditations ending in sleep on this archetype, so that’s cool.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Tarot The Tower, Take 2

Tarot The Tower, Take 1

Thoth Tarot Trumps XVI The Tower

I felt scared. I don’t know why for sure. I mean, something about the Aeons and the Four thinking this was important, and Nero & Co. making sure I was ready and such, just suddenly was frightening. Why do I never think this stuff can hurt me? I wondered to myself. If it can help, it could hurt. Maybe sometimes there is a level of working with stuff where, if you really screw it up, it has some kind of consequences. I mean it doesn’t make sense to believe that a good med can totally change your body, life, and whole reality, but a bad med would just not matter at all. … I was getting the impression of visual via another route, via a kinesthetic like sense. It was very surreal. It had a shape and a twist in it that was just… it was just wrong, in that saturn-green-weird sort of way, I don’t mean wrong like evil, no I mean like, some geometry that is just not native to the dimension it’s being viewed within. … I thought about telling it hello, and saying the usual — “Welcome. I honor you. Thank you for talking with it.” But by the time I was halfway through that thought and the instant I began to imagine saying it — I went unconscious.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Tarot The Tower, Take 1

The Amazing Game; the Tower; Ackrck

I had a conversation with ACKRCK. That’s an inner-identity that showed up and talked to me a few times and very clearly spelled his name (more than once) loudly so I would not forget it. … He said he was the … the “representational identity” of the collected energy of my forehead chakra. … We had a long, like 30 minute back & forth conversation. I did not want to be having it. I felt resistant, resentful, a lot like I did with my Aeons when I first met them. I felt like my logical mind was trying to help me by bellowing, “You’re just making this up!” every 60 seconds whether I needed it or not. I knew I needed to blog it, to record the conversation. But I was in denial so I put it off. Then the next morning I put it off. And that night. And time passed and I kept putting it off until I had, finally, forgotten basically everything that was said.

I have been saying nearly every day: Dear God. Thank you for my role in this AMAZING GAME. Every time I wake up here, it seems so real!! I know that I can do anything while here and there is tons of potential. …

I don’t know if my Four and ‘The Tower’ as we call it are related to this card or not. (I mean, there are a lot of towers in the world, and in symbolism.)

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Amazing Game; the Tower; Ackrck