I have found that:
  • → sincere prayer
  • → genuine intentions
  • → present-focus
  • → extended humor
  • → careful integrity
  • → constant work to discover and release all forms of bias in oneself
  • → dogged effort to pursue awareness, divine guidance and understanding
Leads a person to "interactive insight from the inside."

Consciously I want to evolve.
My ego resists strenuously.
I surreally "forget" so much!
So I blog for myself, mostly:
to re-read and remember.

People ask me where to begin with the complexity of the stuff on my blog. But my imaginal and related work spans 25 years as of 2016. So the real answer is "I don't know." I can't put all that in a sound bite. And one would have to understand, not just intellectually but experientially, a lot of it from start to middle to begin to understand where I am now. It is 'active imagination' work, resting on an extremely 'open' definition of archetype and energy, mapped at times to various occult patterns because they seem useful and otherwise just loosely personal; but that's not all. Short of how the blog speaks for itself that's about all I can say about it. It's a path I've built myself, for one. ~ Palyne

In the human spirit, as in the universe, nothing is higher or lower; everything has equal rights to a common center which manifests its hidden existence precisely through this harmonic relationship between every part and itself.
-- Goethe

Angels transcend every religion, every philosophy, every creed. In fact angels have no religion as we know it... their existence precedes every religious system that has ever existed on earth.
-- St. Thomas Aquinas

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In the beginning all was indivisible. And in becoming manifest, it became, seemingly, divisible. But the divisions must evolve to recognize themselves, and each other, and to then accept themselves, to truly know themselves by knowing each other. To begin, they are blended, confused; it is chaos, it is legion. They are all on the journey to indivisibility, to singularity, to the I AM. The point, of course, is not the destination, but the journey.

-- insight during the Princess of Disks meditation

Spiritual growth is like all other types: you absorb seemingly 'other' energy, and it becomes part of your own sense of identity. The growth is in awareness, and with that comes power which is always over Self.
Diversity is Legion;
Singularity is the I AM.
None of this is new although my approach to it is my own. -- Palyne

Inner Guide is Angelic. She is free of anything akin to doctrine. I call her an Angel because that is the only word I have for it, and because I know, all the way through me, that this is our word for her fundamentally divine nature. Aside from that, I don’t even know what she IS exactly, or what it means, or where it would fit into any model. She is life sized, soul wide, colors and gems and flowers and songs, everything beautiful that ever was, condensed into an identity I am completely in love with–except she feels like part of me too, so it’s like also being in love with yourself, and also with God, and also with the whole universe, both every tiny thing in your mundania, and ‘awareness’ as something so utterly, mind-bogglingly amazing — how could this exist? How could this not exist? How could I ever understand such a thing? — I am left only with joy, with awe.
-- on Inner Guide #4, aka 'Sedaena'. The first IG I had genuine conversation (and reading) with; the first real sign of my HGA.

He is so much inside and outside me, larger than me and yet the light of the tiniest particles of me, I don’t even have a word for whatever it is that he IS. I call him angelic and inner guide and the name he gave me because I have no idea what else to call this. It’s a Being and a Thing and an Event and a Place and a Relationship and… it’s like there is no label that is remotely big enough to encompass whatever it IS.
-- on Inner Guide #5, aka 'Mark.'

The boundary between the imaginational and imaginal is rather fuzzy and it is a developed skill and art to learn to stay there; to maintain your own autonomy while allowing the-others’ autonomy; to be shocked, astounded, grossed out, effused, and other surprise emotions from the interaction; all this without getting lost in the experience like a dream, yet also without pulling back to controlling the experience like a daydream. The former is being swept away by the river, and the latter is standing on the shore thinking about it; learning to walk the fine line of control and allowance to stay in that ‘imaginal realm’ actually takes practice. Crazy people think it’s all autonomous and happening ‘to’ them; people unable to allow this for themselves, may think it’s all imagination; and they’d both be right, because they are both lost; the goal is a whole world that bridges and encompasses both of those.

-- on "Interworlds Meditation"

Q: Where are you now?

Me: Well, back in my own reality.

Q: Wrong. You are in a reality version that distraction and denial have made for you.

Me: How do I get out?

Q: Wrong question. There is no space, there is no time. Where are you again?

Me: Oh. I’m wherever I "pay attention" to being.

Q: Right. You PAY attention. It is the currency of your soul. You rent your reality. Never forget that. The choice to move is yours.

Dealing with the unconscious has become a question of life for us.
The play of the imagination is incalculable.
~ Carl Jung

The imaginary can be innocuous, the imaginal never can.
~ Henry Corbin

A calling may be postponed, avoided, intermittently missed. It may also possess you completely. Whatever; eventually it will out. It makes its claim. The daimon does not go away.
~ James Hillman

There comes a time when the mind takes a higher plane of knowledge but can never prove how it got there.
-- Albert Einstein


This blog documents much of my work in the "inter-worlds" of a greater-self. It's not just esoteric: every thing corresponds — the mundane, the arcane, the divine. If it had to be summed up you might say it is "a universe of personalization." A strange place where monotheism and ultimate-pantheism are one and the same.

I am a natural mystic, if spontaneous experiences determine such a thing. I am not religious in any way; only guidance from the inside drives me. No identities or models unless they are introduced to me from the inside. (Sometimes I use them simply for interest, or because their models are convenient doorways -- but I accept none of their doctrines.) I briefly studied theology at one point, independently (I consider constant prayer a valid part of edu too), and where it led me was "anywhere-else." It's fine for others of course. I consider the heart of free will to be that everyone has their own road. Or as Heinlein once wrote, the right to go to hell in their own handbasket.

This tends to make me obsessed with the divine yet not religious at all, in any form, which is often confusing to onlookers. I am ever in love with and in closer pursuit of integration with The Christ (which I consider a solar-planetary deity, exceeding and preceding all possible religion, though cyclically present within our species) but I'm not remotely a modern Christian, and this also tends to be very confusing to onlookers. I'm a student of archetypes and pattern systems, yet not a jungian intellectual - armchair philosophy bores me - nor a power occultist - which has its own issues (and uniforms) to say the least.

After nearly two decades of certain experiences I felt alone with and thought were unique to me, it turns out I find some harmony in the gnostic writings. I didn't get it from there, and am not fond of that doctrine and the paradigms it came in with, so I ignore it. Which means despite talking about just a few things specific to it (by unknowing accident until a few years ago), I'm not part of that model either.

The road I walk is my own. It doesn't really have an easy label or anybody else on it, that I can see. This is between me and God, so it doesn't really need to work for anybody else. I used to wish I wasn't the only person with such experiences or practices, and started a blog in part in the hope I might find others with something similar. Maybe a need for community. I'm over that now, at least I think. I walk alone, but Light is with me. Can't ask for more than that.

-- Palyne

When we understand that perception is as much about source as target; that energy is a spectrum and best psi perception comes from the center, its balance and blend; that the manifest communication of our Selves is the literal 'reality' we experience; that everything in that reality is a profound 3D language element; that insight with the ‘center’ of spectrum is likely to be via the language-symbols of 'reality;' that these need to be interpreted at the level they are received; this is the path for intentional psi.
-- Insight on the Art of RV

Self-Judging Sanity

Long ago when I wrote Bewilderness, I said in the narrative something like,

I psychoanalyzed myself only until I realized I was obviously a lunatic, at which point I concluded I was just giving myself a complex and might as well stop.

I’ve been kind of in denial of viewing the last couple days even though I want to, and I keep thinking about it, and I miss it so much for not having done nearly enough of it lately. I’m carefully avoiding info on TKR’s latest mission so I can squeeze in viewing the target before I expose myself to talk about it…I missed the deadline by a mile thanks to being simultaneously in interest-but-avoidance.

I need therapy.

Meanwhile, I’ve been thinking about the whole archetype vs. session thing. You know, I’m not 100% sure I can honestly say that getting accurate surface data is more important to me than an experience I feel touches my soul and amazes and inspires me. Calabrese called this “process vs. product” and I think that is a decent way of putting it.

I find that the more I view, the more the process starts to mean more to me. The more that a decent data-session with a poor “experiential factor” is a disappointment, while a lousy data-session with a great “experiential factor” feels like a consolation, and usually like it was well worth the effort regardless of the product result.

I feel that this is contrary to RV as a focus.

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Self-Judging Sanity

Merged Personalities

This makes the second time that shortly after a sense of genuine merging with a target, I was promptly a total bitch to one of the people I love most, finding anything they said no matter how innocent or kind to be irksome, and doing my damnedest to piss them off. Which they buy into as much as I do, when we should both know that after viewing that has that feel to it, I really shouldn’t be communicating with anybody.

I feel almost like… like internally, I recently molted. Haha. You know how snakes (I adore reptiles) are always so cranky when they just molted, their skin is new and tender. I feel like that except internally. Like I have shed an old skin of self, and there is something that is “of me” and yet new there, and it’s very hypersensitive.

Anything that has the slightest disagreement with me, even if I myself share that perspective as well!, seems like a major threat to be defended from, it’s ridiculous.

Oh well. The side effects are part of the learning I guess.


Later: so I fell asleep and kept dreaming that somehow, whenever someone found out that I was actually merging with a target and not just describing it, that I was totally rejected. Then I had several dreams where someone else was in that situation and I saw how others reacted to them when they found that out. I woke up apparently having barely breathed for a

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Merged Personalities

The Cliff-Cave Med

(I edited this a few times ’cause I kept remembering stuff. That’s the thing about the “experiential” bit–it can contain so MUCH info by the time you write it down that you lose it. This is one reason for writing ‘during’ RV — although I think that is overdone sometimes — but the act of writing tends to interfere with experience at times so it’s always a bit iffy on the decision.)

Was doing a tandem with a friend tonight.

The focus goes well, anchoring and feeling ‘in the center’. I’ve been getting all lovey with IG more than usual lately so I attribute it to that.

The archetype arrives and he is a very serious looking, tough, wiry, asian man of middle age. I have a visual flash of a big inset circular shape with something high in the middle. I say my spiel to him about the plans and take his hands. I ask what he has for me. He reaches to a pendant of some symbol I don’t recognize and he yanks on the cord and it comes off in his hand, except somehow he ‘yanked it out of his chest’ too as an overlay to that, and he tied it behind my neck. I look at IG. “Don’t let me forget to take this off when we’re done,” I say, remembering an old experience where the blonde-man-me of The Four realized that “chains equals prisoner” and a commitment of sorts when that symbol-experience happens.

I don’t

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at The Cliff-Cave Med


Lately all my dreams seem to have involved living on another planet, or in a couple cases, an orbiting moon. I’m trying to decide if this has some significance, or if that’s just the cycle of “sitting in on other identities” that I’m in. It always seems to be some situation nearly out of control and dangerous and where I’m trying to escape from authority figures like soldiers or police.

Recently a friend told me of a ‘dream teacher’ he’d met. Someone who worked in a model best compared to Casteneda’s “The Art of Dreaming.” Aside from whatever else Carlos wrote, most of which I considered semi-fiction, that particular book truly described a ton of experiences I’d spent over a year having when I read it, so I really attributed something legit to the info in it.

The idea of someone who consciously can do this stuff was intriguing to me. As soon as I’m not semi-ill anymore (fighting off a cold) so my sleep is halfway normal, I’m going to see if I can go meet the teacher in a dream and get him to teach ME. (Do you suppose there is a dream version of paypal. Heh. If I can approach him in a dream, do you think he’d make me exempt from payment?)

My kid has accepted that dreaming is often “sitting in on” other lives, and now is as fluent at remembering and explaining dreams that amount to sci-fi as I am, which is kind of

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at Dreaming

IG and the Flying Dragon

This morning I was waking up (again) slowly. For the first time in eons, nothing was bugging me, rushing me, beeping at me, screaming at me, or otherwise harrassing my morning. It was saturday around noon which might be why. It felt WONDERFUL.

I turned on the music on my computer. It started on Jai Nunito’s drum stuff, a sort of new age/shamanic album someone gave me. I sleepily imagined myself into my inner world with inner guide (IG), and then fell back asleep again. The album led into an old one by James Taylor. I gradually woke up again, feeling as if I were ‘wrapped in the arms of love’ with IG, it was great.

I finally had enough brain to communicate with him consciously, and I told him how much I loved him and then stretched a little physically, and turned over, and felt like I was burrowing into some amorpheous cloud of energy of him, and I just oozed delight and love all over. For about half an hour we did variations on that theme. It was truly glorious. It’s been far too long since IG and I got that jiggy together. He is so awesome.

Then I had the feeling he wanted me to meet someone or something, an archetype I assumed, and rather languid, I said ok, bring it on, and stretched again. Then I could see inside me, as if I were overlooking an entire terrain, like I were on a small mountain and

This is an excerpt. Read the full article at IG and the Flying Dragon